CHAPTER 3 : NEW HORIZONS OF MOTIVATION

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When we want an incident to have gone in a different way from the way it actually did occur; we do not know how this different way will occur!

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Sleep deprivation causes us to find scapegoats, but the trial is to identify what they are?

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We are impressionable creatures, though with an awareness of it, but it is laborious to affectively impress ourselves to ourselves.

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When we rush, we offer confidence to ourselves when we are not hurrying, and when we are not hurrying we offer confidence to ourselves when we rush.

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The shorter the maxim, the greater is its critical mass.

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We all desire to roughly identify the age we would die, but if we did not know the year we were born, would it count too much?

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State of ideas.- When we halt, some kinds of ending has been made. Also, when we resume to make gaps we compose a beginning, such is the natural cycle of our theory.

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We like to expect, but what is hope? Which interpretation does we takes of hope? Because we never determine or settle, it effectively coerces it possible for us to hope in different surrounding circumstances.

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Much rest comes with reason, when one considers one has had enough before of it.

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Whenever we absolutely hope for something, it does not matter if that something changes as long as we still want it.- For wanting is about the desire to couple, and the sentiment is the glue, we link and we find implementation in the link, as if the passion is what we expect, and the something is only the illusion to it. As with one sex to another the relationship is valued over the person, and frequently impressions are deceptive, or a necessary mirage. And of items we need, we do not desire because they have a role, for want is the desire for things that we do not need, and what one requires is because of what one offers.

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There is a language of explanations in every language, which makes people consider in volatile ways.- I do like that Dylan song, ‘the answer my friend is blowing in the wind‘; I besides had watched that a wasp had been blown by the wind high up and through the little gap where the window opened, but how hard the wasp tried to find the opening it simply buzzed more. The inquiry is which way is the gale blowing, either to the slit, or away from it? For with a towel I gave the wasp another wing, which created its own wind which was in an opposite direction: and is such an air not motivation!

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The more the intelligence of an individual increases, the less that individual loves.- For love is about self-passion, or of the serving of the person, from either perspective of self-love, or outer love: whereas one confronts truth, the other confronts life in a naked form, perhaps even stripped of a body, and one enters life only in a descriptive form of report and details. One can consider too well, and one is too well composed of logic - one is in danger of impressing as primary, for good thinking looks in the mirror; but educated thinking places one in a box!

273

Absolutes weaken the heart, enough to beg for forgiveness, from our obligation for issues to be in satisfactory assortment.

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Absolutions exist, when we lean onto materialistic issues that can only appear as they especially seem to us because they lean onto something else, whether it be a partner, dream, or such and such job.

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Past old smiles or horizons .- What lies between a soul and a ‘good’ smile? Better to know who bestowed them that grin, and we find what we seek between their soul, and their (good in honour subjective pathos) smile, and in this other we find the expression. But subsequently what lies between this expression at their soul, or essence, who is the lead to of the expression? To discover this in the original cause we find wisdom.


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Thus stands another day, but the judicial rank of perspective remains only in style.- One senses the intense in life as distant shores, and things far from ourselves of present reason with strained eyes. But sense is found in factors that have no value, and thus we find resolve in our motivation.

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Value and capital.- It is a strange wonder that love cannot be put in any place, when one tries it moves to exhibit it cannot. As of the greatest inner quality, the greatest outer wealth can be put in any place, and it exhibits itself in the most exact intended fashion.

Thus successful love is also surrender, but not acceptance, for acceptance seeks a form from what is all forms and no forms!

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The merit of love is the query of love – it is fundamentally why one wonders? Why does one bear?

The intention of love is the construction of lifestyle – the touch of things flowing: the difficulty that skins in the reply.

The rapport of love is the discrimination of lifestyle – one wonders it is all a fragmentation of one's own mind. The daily consumption of beauty lies only in our notion of love, but too volatile for any recognition of it: as all invisible concepts in the unconsciousness – only to sink it to transport it up…as for of life we must play too.

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Poem. - Flow To The Flower

On giant streams of drift,
Past the falling tide,
Going to shores far and away,
Flow to the flower.

In timeless energies,
Of notion or motion,
Generation to era,
From delivery to expiration.

Looking back,
Where convictions and fabric are older,
Clues to route finding,
Though a shaded inspiration.

Inspire thy fascination to will,
For a good day,
Through lures,
To bigger and not longer remarks.

280

Vitality in trident areas.- Perfection can abort one down to one’s base character, it brings about one blank to oneself. Many are allured from being for the sake of clarity, and abandoned at the counter roads, though clarity does assign a glimpse of charge. But the being of living needs the blur of non clarity such is the adversity needed in life, in contrast to denial-idealism of the binary dimensional ‘proper’ life!

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When the spectator celebrates more than the doer - the cause of the celebration, it becomes plain to the doer that the onlooker has a greater share in the observance. From this one understands that the laws of essential nature travel through our most technical moments, as a dog chases a cat, but then does the doer become a sucker! It is a period for the doer to increase their shares in the process, where the cat becomes a dog, as a bird which sways from the gale.

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Aphorisms of lyrical substance forestall the temptation of the obvious nobility, and invariably carry themselves off well. From recalls do such aphorisms come from, such images stand in our background like distant landscapes being consistently wayward and outward by ambition. But additionally aphorisms are not such landscapes but paths too, as timeless as the mirage of Aphrodite herself.

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God as an alien authority causes a fear, even in prayers do we brave one’s pretension. We seek to desire the meaning of our deep desires, or dreams of expectations of our lives, without haste. Though the notion of God is so capricious, furthermore it is probably because our need to dream has made us so spirited, though not to stretch for anything like the moon or stars but that vague warmth in ourselves that only we can relate to, which assists us to tame our obstacles, and find a stronger will. As within ourselves we desire a sun that is not so obvious, that some doubt it, as we may have obliged.

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Our suspicion arises when we feel it is about time we had some luck, but where there is hopelessness, mistrust does not arise, as despair does not disturb the psyche. Though to have hope for something, to believe something one does not create a notion of luck: And if not in this time, there will be another time.

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Many things hide and wander themselves in ourselves, and in life.- There is much temptation towards hidden things, but the reality is that there are no speculations, if one trusts the operations that are shrouded: to see the sun in the moon, like day in night.

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Be not yourself, but be sincere.- We are dreamers, and have to revive. We ponder away so much, and in our stillness we hear past footsteps. We question not our judgement, for how can we be wrong: because we seem like ourselves.

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Any life can be condensed to a painting, with all the finer bits and pieces, though this is more than an interpretation of outstanding art, but a common desire. Or perhaps an abstract painting some may feel they deserve, but the mentation needed in their life may appear as a shock.

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What seems startling is how often a web appears in our minds. As in dark cellars one evades to, when rational thoughts with hope lose all inertia, as one declines to think through life.

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It is uphill to comprehend the necessity of overcoming in life, because our convictions are like the climate. When a sky of rain brightens the next day to a sky of light; there will still exist, the previous clouds, thought the day be called sunny.

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Objectiveness is a direct policy of the soul, one watches, and eats, one absolutely is. Whereas subjectivity lies between solutions, it is not on an assignment for maxim. Though objectiveness lies between problems, though in themselves queries can be objective or subjective, but the principle is that questions and answers belong more to simplicity, than objectivity, or subjectivity, as they are a more of an expression of being.

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Inner reality fulfils dreams in our lives.- We request so much, but some things cannot be found in the normal sensuality as we assume that everything is here. Though it is considered wrong to want so much, and also vain - though we are capable of having everything in our lives, our emptiness exists not for survival but how can evolution put such a big empty cup inside of ourselves that does not serve evolution, but the spiritual quest.

Though dreams cannot be achieved through work, and doing things, especially dreams with exalted spirit, but that is why they are dreams, as yet they propel our reality, unlike the dreams of sleep which defrag and sublime our reality. Though such a reality we cannot order for ourselves, but because it is as free as the body that we use for the things we do in life, yet it must come from a deeper reality.

292

On life plans.- Improvisation is a sample of ‘pure inspiration’ - adapting in the moment, one seizes the moment, free from tied contract and display: the relevant moment in the instant, between pulses. But one has to improvise on improvisation, one has to adapt, in such moments with too many options. True improvisation cannot be planned, as Jazz, but it relies on a complete trust of oneself. Though the irony is that from such moments reservoirs are created, from which origins of plans are designed.

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Soul motive power living. - Consider what common wave of motivation comes, and where it takes one, perhaps only to a motivated state of something becoming more prepared to over loaded or to elevate an impassioned and adapt firestorm of advantage on a course of action. Though this is a side issue, for a reason of underlying motive has to provide reasons for motivation, rather than favourable and negative weightings.

Firstly happiness must be based on being, the ontological state must find such posture: reaching and going beyond this and that. Everybody is go geared up in present motivational stance, but only spending off their inner resources. One has to motivate through reason, because one thinks thus, and said this and that, and one is led through the fire: it is enough to throw one stone in the pond every day, one need not throw oneself into it…

294

Poem Of Tragic Forces

In our empty space of fading energy, of relative illusion of…
Too much hope in a hopeless world,
And yet something of something,
Embrace thy heart within thy heart.

Let old memories lie, and steal forgetfulness,
I regularly perceive low qualities of folk,
Like mistrust lost in confusion,
Laying on frosty ground, echoing thin(king) shade.

But demons come in human form,
And many a devil lie waiting,
Trust lays beaten and tortured,
To a core, red eyes lurk.

To climb to peak experience,
Like raindrops resting on fogs,
For the frost will turn them to snow,
At the close of the alley one finds another alleyway.

295

Poem Of The Tree

There is an appointment inside echoing desire,
A portal that does not, though desire to open-
For fear of who we honestly are,
Yet we the stranger are gripped.

Find places that relate to us inside,
And our aims are not ours,
Though the hope for them is,
Wish then for realizations because we are ourselves.

There is a street in the world,
With wonder we seek,
And can we catch our falling leaves,
As our spirit is like a tree.

The tree represents our reflections of dreams,
Its branches are our speed of action,
For longer branches reach further and are slower;
For patience is the measure of dreams.

The shadow of the tree is our dreams,
And the wood is our world,
But the shape and form of the soul,
expresses our reality.

296

Poem Of Attraction And Distraction

While we run away, things pass anyway.
When we speed, we also desert our courage.
Distraction is the rival of bearing in life,
And attraction leads to direction in life.

Many desire love in their core,
And henceforth many directions are found from it.
Though of hatred,
Directions lead backwards in life.

Fond memories bring cheer to face,
Even lost love brings inertia where there is none.
And of hope, what is it made of?
Not of mistrust, or even certainty but through the bringing of oneself ahead.

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Innocence.- One looks for the sense of innocence, because it is so much about ourselves, and responsibility does not shallow it. Also, it is a relevant branch of that innocence that sets will and purpose within. What of this personal innocence we seek, for it is of worth? It is but the necessity inside which has turned to meaning: observing the subjective turned to the objective, rather than the thought reacting to the feeling, the feeling becomes the thought, and this thought stands in innocence as a new thought, and not related to the previous thought. So this feeling which reacts to this new thought is the feeling of innocence.

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It is appealing that in the minds mapping so many things appear preset, and that many things work more with progression, than evolution.- One can be consumed by the bulk of contradicting, but valid or worthy posts, but it is the ideas that are self-critical, which open their essence to the backer. Which do not complicate, but simplify observations of eternal wealth, for such things stick to the soul. Whereas the technique of preconceived points, is of accessibility, soul, and sparkle, or expressiveness in the true sense of truth.

The aphorism is like salvation, because it takes oneself to the depths, though it seems the aphorisms create this depth in the path finder, but this is not true, for it shows the depths as something new, but it is not new to readers, for the unconscious part of themselves are the readers too of themselves.

Aphorisms are youthful travellers that marvel for responses, with truth as a motivator. But what motivated one to truth, if truth does not motivate, one has to follow ones motivations and this could lead one to a truth seeker, or one that is motivated by truth: to follow any motivation will eventually lead to this, and this is the intent of incentive, as a preset, or a formerly prepared exam, in the same way that one may progress with exams in life, or academy from nursery to high school! For the law makers are not the law givers, but it is part of the preset routine, thus it is no task for a philosopher; for we are all servants of truth, and aphorisms in this scheme are psalms for all religions.

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It is through the light in ourselves that we want to change our meanings, like a new decoration to life, but does one criticise? When one wonders, anything can occur, including criticism. To think or to wonder opens the mysteries of life, and our vision comes out again to the horizon, from the darkness of normality.

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What do we laugh about? But joy enters the mind, but never cry, at any price for then the mind becomes void and tears will drown thought. Better to admit a feeling of defeat exists, and that is all, rather than to deny it and become a victim of defeat.

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Impulse is the assurance of skills, the doing without the applause: a silence without doubt. A rising that rises not in a pretentious way , but in a way that captures that there abides an essential reason to be motivated. To pass the moment in a risen way to capture ones essence, with or without audience, though led by an inner non-caring: from one whisper to another, and past the shadow of ones doubt.

302

Writing and conceiving should banish affections, but thoughts evaporate, as if one takes the air of thoughts. And with this gravity of objectivity one sinks to the depths...and externally unraveling aesthetic distance.

Though distance, and intimacy is acted in a progressive cycle, for the objective will lead to the subjective, as all things tend to the familiars - over the years: noting that the cycle is not broken(from the collective unconsciousness) but a change in the objective will lead to an adjustment in the subjective.

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The action of motivation in life is wasted if one only seeks through searching, but the traveller of life is the stillest, for then one feels the frames of this picture, or this movie called life. As one finds goals by slowing down the perception of life, to take the blur out of things, for it can feel likes a question that is appearing on a cardboard that is moved in many directions: but never still enough ever to see.

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One has to wonder at what of us hesitates, and what succeeds in our everydayness. To recognise, what is behind the structure and formalities of it all. Do we just exist to serve ourselves, and what does define love? Why should we wonder, where does dare meet hope, and as we age, why do we look backwards? Where has all the humanity gone, why thus do we strive so hard.

The reason is haste, we challenge so much, or become too rough to feel life. We consume ourselves, and we doubt so much. One needs to climb, more in reflection then attitude, and to judge more in introspection. Though not to judge ourselves, but where our meaning for judgment does – blame, who is responsible, yet we see things going wrong all the time. We need to realise that it is the mind which rushes to conclusions, not us, nor do we sit in feelings. Maybe the mind likes to spin like a roundabout, but it is our conscious that is thrown from it, why do we try to still it? Nor is it us that slips to despair, but our feelings, and we ‘need’ to excite them, perhaps emotionally we are quiet creatures, we only need to rest the conscious onto itself , for it need not sit anywhere, as one may pretend to sit!

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The imagination of the personal.- Perhaps a step towards ineffectual sentimentality, but freedom also lies in this direction.

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If you accept freshness as a virtue - has any happiness felt dull? Though to desire or commit oneself to freshness in order to experience sanity one must learn to be the idiot, for one becomes madder than life, it is only then that one sees the sanity in life; though this defines teenage wondering, but freshness works better to find freedom, and here lies sanity: such is the path of saneness.

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Leaders are wizards, and magicians that entertain.- When we are brought into this world, we do not bring ourselves to this world. We do not enter to find such a wardrobe in another life to enter, though rebirth is not a conscious act. So we chase, and as children we simply follow - no child guides.

Though some children may lead other children, but children find management in all forms, and it is something we continue in our lives. We reflect in this light, though this light be a living person or a ‘personal’ religion - nobody leads any light, only darkness. Leaders are there more to give an illusion of being born to lead, we merely seek to find purpose, but it is only our model that guides us.

So many answers we need, and we desire an earthly light, and we need fantasies of leadership, for parliamentary leaders are there to entertain. For political comfort belongs to entertainment. We reach for so much, and naturally choose the comfort givers as leaders, though how can any leader have a knowledge of the light when the lamp that brings light to the world is so dim.

308

The suitcase of life.- It is sympathetic to find much relief in determining methods to not go into the measures. It is as well more fun, to escape the depths of thinking, even in the procedure, but we merely do as we are told - especially when we suppose we do not. Even in complexity we find no depth; in such a method in complexity finds summary. Though switching subjects finds help also, and perhaps one can go back. It would be better to make the briefness of conversation brief and call it good manners, rather than to go beyond intimacy to soulmacy: and lives become briefs and of people who live in suitcases.

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Our demands are many, and are impulses lead to self destructive habits, such are our thoughts. And being constructive is the advice naturally given, but the idea of constructive action is as wide open as life. How does one construct answers, if one was to construct one’s mind where would one begin? The reality is that being constructive could also be destructive, and destructive acts can lead one to appropriate reflection and reasoning direction as even destruction is constructed…

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The more your desire increases even with the most purposeful of intentions, you may unearth that you will want it less in your hands.

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We seek the old motivation in a renewed manner to move us to a new frontier as the past represents a sentimentality that can ignite a spirit. And hence one enchants simplicity in one's need for the essence, when the surface cause and influences leave us feeling vain; perhaps a light in one's perception is found to follow, but one is never heedless if one reaches for the steps with one's heart: we only risk blindness when our eyes influence the way.

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If everybody had an asset for every disadvantage, existence would be in a stale mate. For example if a man contemplated a downfall in his life, he would query what would become of him, and in that sense he would doubt his destiny, whereas a person in a less obvious downfall would never enquire the meaning of their destiny, for it takes great storms for one to put such a paddle into one’s consciousness as to turn one’s consciousness to one’s destiny. Whereas a person of less obvious downfall may experience a downfall in also a less clear way, and lacks the motivator to look at their life with intuition.

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We try so hard to divert ourselves, we amuse ourselves, and we also talk about what ever is on offer, but even to be motivated by life means one cannot be motivated by the life that one’s casual motivation comes from. As philosophy has developed in a unique way in history, and has been able to reference itself and still remain so independent, though always remaining with some casual cultural influences, it offers a better solution to motivate ourselves. For our casual motivation does not lead to one’s philosophy, as one’s motivation is independent from one’s happiness.

We wonder in our depths to see what remains (as we sink deeper) we try to allow a message to come from our inner perception, hoping a drive will come of it. But motivation is only a dress, or style of form. The method of finding a motivation of our desires represents a finding of style or dress for the desire, through a process of unwinding, or extending ourselves to our desires. For desires come out in mutilated form much too often, as we ‘will’ instead of ‘motivating’ our desire, as our desires lack any sense: we send our desires naked to the world, and we are surprised that our desires are fulfilled in such a perverse manner.

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Thus our hearts be in motion as ripples are set, we are taken away, and passion grips with movement; yet it is the same world that has passed you by so many times. We require a catching of ourselves, as if our inner world is playing a ‘high drama’. We stay put where we are and consider a refusal to let go of anything which one has gained, but passion is not about doing but inner-doing, finding what requires us to work. Any slipping has to be noticed, for it takes only a small slip to fall – we only become more motivated when we do not fall.

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Life just passes us by, and so it becomes and yet saturated with the habit of living, or the habit of doing what is required, or in another way - the habit of being limited, for not all talent comes with birth. The greatest miracle in the naturalist sense is that one can gain talent during one's life, though many close to the idea.

We create the frustration ourselves, and sometimes we give up, but this can be a good thing as then we may look at something in a different way, or try something else in an unnatural sense. We all try new things, and flirt with our perceptions of others and other things and being able to endure frustration could help one to express one's motivation.

The second question could be not how to be more motivated, but how to express, or release one's motivation? One must find a path that is not obvious, one needs contrast to express, and create good desire. Though the fulfilment of desire is not your purpose, but the purpose of the world. Nor is it Individually selfish for one appreciates others when the world appreciates oneself: as light is reflected.

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Age and belief. - The desire for life and perhaps the deeper one goes towards life through the process of aging; does one become more of life being more in life? Where does one find the essence of life, but in one's passion and not in one's age?

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Sensing that shadow that never leaves me – it ages too. With time also passing and leaving, but being aware of poverty of every sought resides on mother earth, and only one hope can lead as a nod for motivation, that one has become more of the light in this darkness: that one dares not to cut jokes from one’s heart.

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Elegance requires modesty, to summarise something of significance, but it is also a part of the merit of things of significance.

319

The becoming of childhood towards later age is about the understanding that having problems and solutions not (of) a final absolution is the responsibility of sensibility.

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The chance involved in accidents is always influenced by control of considerations that affect the stability of situations, but only the mind can be geared up well. Whereas the intoxication of ideas leads well in the dance of life, or the drama of the will; thus step are placed well.

321

Our limits must serve a purpose, as if to keep ourselves within certain limits. Though motivation does not necessarily mean being rootless to new ground, one should be motivated from what is around of oneself.

322

To explain is to confuse, because understanding is understood as an explanation, but explaining does not comfortably lead to understanding. As things are better explained when they are described – learning works through a reflection of the form of what is to be understood, and understanding is an end result in the process of learning: for pure learning has pure form, and pure understanding has no form.

323

Can we kindly accept everything unconditionally? Are we able in being kind to ourselves? Why cheat ourselves and create another illusion outside the illusion of reality.

We clearly obligate to necessitate our grandness to the skies, and as we were, as we become. To willingly follow downright truth, to trust truth at any cost, to elude common sense, but to embark the best of oneself, and to reflect recent fears to hopes of real glorification without egoation.

324

The daydream of motivation, the screen kiss only motivates a kiss.- When we are entertained without a desire of honesty, we are generally amused and we do not want to go below the facade, though many mystify technicalities with depth or even fashion with a vague idea of depth in a collective consciousness. Though many are motivated by distraction, it is a colourful move with energy, though with no cause, as many young children may put on an act; entertainment motivates by motivating others to entertain: one goes off the deep tracks and these other tracks lead only to motivate another to help another but not to help any person. Hence some investigate for motivation which may not be compelling, seeking a motivation with pathos: where energy finds secret tracks to the surface.

325

We are all born in the heart of stimulus, so absolute boredom cannot exist; for one is not emptiness in itself. Though many feel a deep, and even rigid boredom – they may feel like dust, that the psyche is not a object in itself, but it is the experience of the soul in the body that is the void. The inward nature has to be drawn not to the experience of the soul in the body, but to the perception or colour of the soul. For to connect to the soul means nothing if one only touches it, one also has to incorporate with it.

326

On simple motivation.- The financial prerogative gives a physical drive for success, and one has personal ambition, but this is not self motivation but more a motivation that is based on comparison; many who seek solace concerning their security can cause insecurity. To plan out ambition may lead to the collapse of one’s plans in the lanes that make life worth living.

Honest motivation has to go beyond what is convenient and be proper to one’s sense of purpose in existence. Though motivation has to be observed as being different from the purpose of life, for that is how motivation stays honest. For honest motivation motivates in all things, it is a sensing that all is not vain whether in pain or pleasure, or loss and faith.

The necessity is not the prerogative of a motivated spirit, or being motivated to fill oneself with life easily impresses but it belongs more to the social learning for life rather than motivation, as in the long term it can only lead to an emptying in oneself if the hunger for the feeling of life is used for motivation.

327

The risking of life is a necessity for it.- For purpose is not given to oneself simply to protect it, but life stands in nature, we all live too much in the wonder of our mortality. But the more we risk the more we can gain, not to play poker with life, but to be the cards in the game, and to allow life to play poker with us. We are fragile, our skin is soft, and here we find motivation in the most unlikely of places; to give permission to life to put us where she likes: in such quietness we find acceptance, and to be content with one's shadow, as delicate and unnerving as it may be.

328

Many things provoke us, as do insights into a matter which can help the bloom of a thing to be kept. Also penetrations create directions that follow away from stereo-typical paths, which tend to lead to another world of stereo-typical behaviors. The Grand Illusion is also the Grand Generalization, without details one fades into life, though one may call it what one wants, age; though many welcome the excuse. We must necessitate a Grand Prompt to a greater reality, for artificiality is expressed with purpose in Art, than in life. One has to wonder, that the most general personality is probably the most complex, whereas one who digs for insights, and glimpses the sublime in the horizon, makes openness from the detail, and hence one belongs, to a place, not just a home of the drama, without the facade.

329

Theories can become over imaginable, and for this reason they can break the waves that come of boredom to our shores, of moods and feelings of melancholy. Such is the abstract speculation of it, wrong or right, but the need for theories is not about validating them at the expense of resources, but through the process, it is the exercise. One simply swings if one does not theorise, one has to adopt one’s ideas to theories, though with systematic theorising between different ideas, one increases the validity of the theory.

330

Relationships and motivation.- Many couples are motivated by their own negation of themselves and not necessarily due to the pleasure of the other. As the pleasure of another cannot take the pain away of oneself. But can one become more without the fear of being less, what does one wonder at such a crowd that calls itself the family, or all crowds.

Though the purpose of being a ‘couple’ objectively is the continuation of the species, but the subjective purpose cannot be so outwardly, and has to be a surface to oneself. Does the status, personality, or the look motivate oneself, one needs to feel also the void in the other, and then one is motivated by the void. The principle of sociality has to be based on finding the void in oneself, but not to resolve it: nevertheless it is to find the essence of the void in the problematic sense, and here lies the purpose of being social, or why one should talk to another.

331

There is the endless infinity in the sentence; we are crippled though by the magnitude of the stress, and change of the pace of things. Yet we restrict our interactions with others to simplicity, and of the many directions in communicating we become lost, following a constant forwarding and retreating. Trapped in the loops of life, freeing ourselves to only enter another loop, with distraction in the background of distraction, yet in such a glaciaire where the motivator exists as a problem with reason.

332

Philosophy justifies and drives thinking.- There are many who are led lowly by sense and sensibility, but as all such things are relative; even a shallow being can feel a sense of going to endless depths, without really going past the shallowness. Such people are emotionally sincere and honest in the representation and presentation of this; one has to be motivated often; so as not to allude oneself. The trick is never to be content with the depths one has passed, and why should not a good past go on, without any final solution or final damnation: but by not finding a conclusive answer or one should not desire comfort, or a feeling of exhaustion to what is sensible.

333

In the stony silence when we can sense our stillest thoughts, one may wonder that even these suffer the same chaos as our ‘swinging‘ thoughts; though all religious and spiritual philosophy gives greater value to silent thinking, and even frank discussion.

In the silence when we can sense our stillest thoughts, do we forget or remember more? It is in our most rare moments that we consider as if we had no history. If our peace rests in thoughts - faster thinking covers more ground: peace is better achieved through thinking, instead of feeling.

334

Soul dressing.- It is in our necessity and obligation, or drive that needs to respond to the erratic narrative of life, within its’ corridors of depth and greater depth. To surrender to this obligation – to bow to life, and what rain of reason it feeds on; though some ideas will grow in deserts.

The pain of life is not pain, for pain is reaction towards the existence of life, it desires that it can lose itself into the living process. Though one has to wonder and sometimes to move one’s gaze away from the soreness towards the wonder of life, as here lies much zest to add to one’s stimulus. One does not desire to be more than life, for one also becomes less than life: one does desire a straight road to one’s heart, and in it perhaps bridges need mending.

Though another wonder would be desire, or pure desire; the desire behind all desires, the first cause of all affirmations. Can one be so close to one’s heart, to move thoughts with its beats, alas the pure desire, which is stripped of understanding – for this is what it means to connect oneself to one’s heart.

335

Mental armor.- Too many questions, but expansion is a part of the joy of life, as a record played too often becomes scratched. Answers are a jig of hopes; one wants possibilities and other roads, to open the inward outwardly. Instead everything seems to clash in the day, too many comparisons leaves us dry, too many questions gives the day a desert landscape, yet the whole life mass continues (the great river of cause and effect) of shadow, moisture and walls. The cause and effect is also the question and answer, better to be a mist instead of a boat in this sea of life.

336

The tower of absolute reason.- Reason, is human reason, as our brains are of a type, therefore it follows that different species will have a different kinds of reason; we can expand our idea of reason… we are crippled by intentions, as the cause of reason, as intentions are limited by our reasoning; reasoning requires a march, or a more fluid kind of thinking, for there are different ways to put words together, or images.

The typical build on reason is putting words or images on top of each, and as the tower becomes higher we are prompted to act on that reason. One can improve one’s reasoning by putting words or images horizontally, and decide which word or image is the best, and slowly creates a tower of absolute reason.

337

The world being as vice and represented by victim values.- One desires an understanding beyond the colours of life, beyond the give and take of mono (or money) values as motivation, for in this layer all victims live. In reasonable passion lies meaning, and reasons motivate using their meanings, thus is positive motivation represented, though fear is of the victim, as negative motivation: one is forced to the surface and into the world being represented by cost and jealousy.

The fog of life; one follows one's given road, but it is hard to follow. The irony is that depth (as represented by a sea in one's mind leads to a greater consciousness, one finds more reasons to live) clears the way with blue skies. And 'this' path one finds in higher consciousness calls itself the silent wind and one is in wonder at the soul of 'this' path, as representation of our will to live.

338

One has to open one’s sphere to the wonder of day and night. The subjectivity of ourselves, the moon and of the sun, that relationship, though the objectivity of it is the run of the mill: one has a duty to extend one’s compliment to the harmonics of these three bodies.

339

Are these thoughts with interest? Do they have a palette for modern minds? Only if one allows life in with its sense of meaning, all it's shadows: the reality of life.

340

Aesthetic friction.- Why be so critical with the spirit, when the will decides what is possible, but the wind that blows the will is connected to the spirit of the person, right or wrong. But if life is negative, the normality of the world is a world of deception, greed and delusion; one has to accept the world. Perhaps it is more positive to be negative in a negative world, whether in a spiritual or non-spiritual way, for there is no heaven now on earth. Either evolution has failed us, or the idea of evolution has betrayed itself, or perhaps the feeling of life has become old itself. Life does demand a high act of treason to such a world, a desert to cross, to achieve a moral dignity.

341

The more intellectual a person becomes the more complex patterns emerge in their mind’s domain, though these abstractions are not reliant on the person’s intelligence, but they refer to a stronger mental focus, or gain.

342

This life, and our promise to life, made when we first glimpse this world, not just an act of birth? But a new dress gives us this life in a physical reality, and allows a spirited expression in a new dimension. And in this reality, in this world of crime, and moral delusion we desire escape, as if a path exists through wealth, but luxury makes us vain and shallow, we simply desire to run but not from ourselves, until we accept the actuality of life: to confess it, not to know thyself, for the atmosphere of the world distracts us, but to admit there is a crisis on earth – thus, the answer is the confession.

343

If wishes and prayers were all answered, we would not be able to live with any peace; it is with good reason that only a few are granted.

344

Distractions force reflections of different perspectives, one does not resist, for distractions distil us; it teaches that the process of life is about subtraction, and not addition. One has to distil oneself, for in one’s essence one connects back to one’s spiritual sense: one may anticipate erosion, but one gains.

345

Jealousy is that inner upheaval that is never admitted, for one is the last to know, one masters the self-lie, as all jealousies are created through the self-lie - the dismissal of the soul to the body, whereas limits create comfort. Though light jealousy can be admitted, and what can be admitted can be faced, one wonders with a long steer and one can steer one’s boat to a safer haven.

346

Being lowly is being light.- Every grandness has an opposing force.

347

Hope is always temporary, for if it was permanent it would not be hope but despair; for this case all despair is born from hopes.

348

Modern life can go so many ways, as prospects appear there for the seizing, though the simple path still brings much relief; with a stronger pathos, but minimalism is it’s danger.

349

Justified intelligence.- Intelligence brings oneself light, as ignorance can lead to darkness, but too much information can blind oneself though it is the light that guides at cross-roads. There is an art in knowing and not knowing things, and this is absolute justification, which is beyond personal justification.

350

The whip does not lead, but one may jump. One may reflect what sign is fear hinting, what turning is required? For one can wonder too much, but it is the ‘casual’ first step, that draws one to the last step. All fears must be resolved before one can be motivated in a real sense of functionality for fear leads in earnest and one may slip.

351

Delusions of grandeur, are origins of the most widespread fears, as they create very expectant hopes. A good hope maker must not jump steps.

352

How does one offer survival to an idea, but by giving good attention to it, but what is good attention but being in good mood, the interaction of a subjective interest, with an objective interest. For a good mood requires a good subject of interest: a healthy inward to outer relationship.

353

Plane or glider.- Tiredness can give a sense of purpose, one must try to get tired in one way or the other; for one must build motivation with blocks of interest.

354

When all doubts have been answered, and all questions put to rest, it is here that one submits to life like a child, but not before this happens.

355

Quests of motivation.- Accuracy and perceiving go hand in hand, one needs accuracy for this affects one’s seeing in life. One improves accuracy in life by becoming more perceptual, which is a way to observe through oneself, and simply not through one’s eyes. Then emerges a good will, and then with a profound simplicity one can find that path. With peace one learns to walk along this new path, for all paths have purpose, but it is the path that has purpose for oneself that is needed: it is a quest that determines one’s perception, and all quests first seek for the horizon.

356

Distance between past sentimentalities and hope.- One needs an inner perspective for a ‘rich’ mindscape as claustrophobic thinking does not prompt oneself to life. Henceforth the belief in one’s struggle, as if one is always in a passionate light is wanted to feel assured with mental sincerity, which is lost with ‘positive thinking’: though if one be the only one, let it be…but one’s tasks will always stand in front of oneself…though one’s tasks must first stand behind of oneself.

357

Open thy eyes, and persist in the understanding that reveals the night to be of texture.- There is a measure of things that are hidden, and there is pleasure in how they are revealed, or brought to the light. Hence we accept, the darkness and lightness, for the shades can intoxicate life, and too much light can blind oneself to life and the experience of passing time, or the measure of things. The eyes thus adjust to the nature of the darkness of the world; though many close their eyes to the darkness, and simply forget that their eyes are closed.

CHAPTER 4 : PRIVATE PHILOSOPHIES

358

The demand for development outside our objectiveness of things brings us to follow routes in a straightforwardness that makes us easy to understand. Nevertheless there can be no full appreciation of oneself without the complete portrait of oneself, hence we desire to feel complete without pretensions, a private matter, or a private philosophy; a border of subjective understanding, a philosophy of containment, in contrast to the philosophy of our public projections, our objective understanding of things of life.

359

There is the formal expression, and below that is the natural expression, but the foundation is the private philosophy: through these actions the soul's expression. There is nothing common with our primal expression, there is a part we need to express to ourselves.

360

The innocent sensation of energy, the gentle air of everything, in simplicity, for this we must submit, before we realise. For there has to be a connection to oneself, though not to connect to life, to keenly discover who we are, as it is not enough to consider that I am not others. But in the melting pot of your differences you hopefully meet a purpose, which is not a purpose as being active in a job, but to free ourselves from our capacity, consider this, or consider that your thoughts are held in a prison of bone.

361

On choices.- One may opt to look inward, as one is looking outward, but how is this possible without the impressions and smiles of the external world, how can the inner world compete with this! People have so much interest in how they look, though people are not very individual in how they look, one's eyes may have come from grandpa, and one's smile from one's dad. Though one inherits this dullness in life, which is kind of like a default, when we feel good, bad, or even dull it is in respect to this dullness. So why do we inherit this dullness, what is the ground for this dullness? Well, the truth is that we also inherit our thinking, but it is more obviously from our parents, and from this thinking we make decisions, but it is not an individual choice, and that is the cause of this inherit dullness, as our choices are governed by the choice of our birth, which resulted in the pregnancy of our birth.

362

Problems bear discomfort, but one has to explain it to oneself using exclamation, and examination – one desires to wonder away from the outer wayward nature of sensations. And even less of individual concern but of personal concern, as the personal is of subjective experience and the Individual of different experience. One needs to feel that one can read matters in a way that explains things in a way that makes one worthy of the dramatics in life which puzzle and riddle us with doubt.

363

Bow to one's sufferings if the light be of truth.- There is a tiredness associated with meaning, not just through expression. I would think that this is a tiredness to respect, for then life will respect that tiredness. People are terrified of this tiredness, but it has a sublime beauty, more chic than the catwalks of fashion. Thus to bow to this tiredness life will bow to oneself, and solve it's problems for oneself, thus is the Individual posed in life. There is a pleasure in becoming, but the headache is worn like a crown.

364

The primal directive is to grow up.- Trying, but not deceiving – gentle, but not forwarding one removes the veil from one’s face, and one sees the place where
expression comes from. The truth is that there is no connection, but with oneself, and to meet oneself behind even the sensations of feelings. To know the place, that nobody knows, where the stillness of confidentiality reigns, one seeks beyond the cover of masks.

365

Life tests people in different ways, but people test others in the way that life tests them. Individual value changes, from one to another, that is why we pay for things, but value exists in the essence of things too. Though we are living there is a cost to living, but there is always something in our problems that is unique, though it be as plain as a false smile to a real tear: a simple thing separates oneself from others.

366

As one will make sounds in the day, one will say things, and make steps; one assumes a silence inside. Though there is a world of noise inside the body, the beat of the heart, the sound of blood hastening, the sound of breathing, there is also the sound of one’s fundamental nature of thoughts with sound. It may be an imagined sound of thoughts, but music must come from some place? Thoughts must generate a heard ripple in the consciousness, before some words are aimed and expressed fearfully, or peacefully, and do we express the sounds of our inner thoughts more than the words of our inner voice or the meaning of the words more, or a fuller expression containing all our meaning and noise of our words with no subtle control? Many times we can guess a person’s mood from their silence, meaning our inner tools can be used externally, and hence outer tools can be used internally!

367

So straight and tall with colour and illusion the external world stands as if nothing else can exist, but to believe in this is to believe in labels, and not the consciousness of energy that one needs to return to find the essence. Hence one leaves behind all baggage of curses, falsehoods and raised opinions, one takes only things of the external that point to the direction of the essence, and then the consciousness sits, and says I am this, and I was not really that. The truth is that even the outer sensations of life are amplified or given a voice from micro sensations and mutterings of the self; one submits more to oneself to elevate oneself. Suddenly all union is lost, but one finds empathy with simple connections to life, one returns to the external world, but ready to hook up to the essence of the external world.

368

A path to the essence; such a well feeds our soul. - To think inside the border of our subjective understanding, one has to wonder without prejudice. One says, ‘Hello how is oneself?’ and it is said different to how other people say it, but can one trust oneself – for private philosophy is about how well one talks to oneself. One reaches for oneself because one is one self. However, once that idea of our spirit or us is lost we lose our sense of subtle ambition: our drive without ambition.

369

Heart of certainty.- To seek a door inside, and enter well, ‘what is there?’ – to go deeper, to one’s last shores to one’s glaciers. Am I worthy to live well? A private investigation, one looks inside of oneself, and is lucky to even see a glimpse. Through such steps one walks away from the world of shadows and prepares oneself for steps of faith: as if the mind itself looks into itself, intuition turned towards intuition. One must sway one’s heart away from certainty, for certainty is also the edge of a dagger.

370

There is a necessity for believing in something that pastes one to life, one needs such signposts to help one to keep on one’s way; one should not argue about beliefs of different faiths, for it performs the same function in people of different faiths, and in between faiths, or even in my sense Spiritual Individualism. The passage through the experience of life deserves one to have a rich perception, and an empty head is a poor perception. Beliefs are always changing, like a running stream of thought flowing like water, but belief is a testing of life through personal experience. So how does one decide on their belief system, is my feeling towards this warm or cold? Why is this feeling warm or cold? Does it help to improve my experience of life? It is also true that a belief in something can help one to overcome a certain time stretch, and then one may be lead to a different belief: the truth about beliefs is that one is drawn to things through The Law Of Attraction as one may be drawn to take a picture of something: it is an impulse a drawing to something, and to some a losing of oneself into something, as other things have failed or disappointed oneself – one is drawn to a new support…which in the moment serves a purpose, for having a God serves the same deep function as with having no God, knowing attraction and repelation rely on the same forces as with magnets.

371

Problems make the world smaller; one needs to sow answers before there can be a harvest. One does not sow these seeds with mutterings in a social width of a circle, but it requires an internal weather – deep within us, for deeper problems require depth, general problems of living are dealt with sweat, and interviews on pins and needles.

One cannot become so powerful as to ignore such things, one needs only enough power to be responsible for oneself, as power does not provide answers. Listen to the part of ourselves that speaks less, for we have heard our voice enough times and so have others.

372

Longing.- One desires for something because it is unattainable and thereby creating a personal confusion of the desires that are possible. One then desires with gentleness without urgency, simply to feel good: thus we move around our world, our hearts move around us, let our senses sense what they can, and let longings shorten to long-term plans.

Put on my crown; I have immortal longings in me. Shak.[1913 Webster]

373

The reason for this importance on Individuality is that one at least has moments in their life that do not betray oneself, that shine with one’s own light – the only light that one can trust. It is true that many follow other lights to guide their beliefs or spiritual systems, but it is through one’s own personal light that one observes the light in these other systems. We must create these moments for ourselves, not necessarily crossroads in our lives, but moments in life that are worthy of repetition, or are worthy of being lived through again as a good melody. Hence such a drive also connects to the will to live, as we must serve ourselves before we serve life, then one creates clarity and sharpness of vision that breaks through the muddiness with grandiose introversion. One moves thus, for only the Individual believes in oneself, it is also beliefs that give their desires life, for the desire is the aim, and the belief is the method. There are other beliefs which are connected to other desires, but the desire to live is connected to the belief in oneself, which directly opposes the fear of death.

374

Too safe in life.- Risks can unfasten up more possibilities in life, though one may prefer a throne of sanctuary. It is interesting that when life becomes a bubble of security a natural chaos creaks in nevertheless; one does need the possibility of things going wrong... For what is risk but that determined reach for something: that extra pull. Many having fallen simply from a fear of falling, one is drawn to something, but for each Individual there is a distant star to follow. One may take too many steps backwards; as one is distracted by the sensations of life that promise so much as effort appears to be more valued and also rewarded in comparison to the resolutions of thought and feeling: one belongs more to the social than to oneself.

375

Sometimes the idea of being proper is vague, but all Individuals are given signs, as if a path exists into the future, such are these signs represented by footsteps in the future, though not seen and heard as footsteps in the past, which are more progressions and 'little histories' or memories of oneself. Signs exist everywhere, but the emphasis of certain things in life attract us, perhaps through obsession, thus is our story laid to us by the connection of these dots; though such a reflection requires focus and perspective.

Sometimes the idea of being proper is vague, one's path may dictate one to a humbleness of dependence, for the adult can also express a need and reflective ness towards childlike tendencies, and the child may also express a need and reflective ness towards adult tendencies. One must not fear to lean on things if one wonders at the consciousness, as one may lean on one furniture to look under another furniture, thus the adult finds the child's grip.

376

We are designed to be spiritual.- There is more to life than life, as many find out that age does not tame life, but too much living wears out the body, as living wears out clothes: there is more to life than living. One needs to wonder inside wonder, to reflect within reflection to see what one cannot see to aid what one does see.

377

It is a good exercise to overcome boredom, thus one trains the spirit; boredom is a sign of an unhealthy spirit – it is also said that an ill spirit loses interest in things.

378

In many cases in the company of others one is set to task oneself, though it may seem that others are tasked.

379

Games belong more to children and toys, rather than adults and jobs, but there is a subtle play in the subconscious adult landscapes that are essential to living with purpose, though games have no purpose except this purpose.

380

All people fall in the same way, but those who rise in the same way only rise in their heads, thus starts the perception game. One may think one thing, but things may be another way, but one can work out things with relative certainty. One is more sure about one thing than another thing, so one can be more certain about a thing because one is less convinced about other things. The truth is that certainty can only exist relative to oneself, because the plane of reality that one’s relative certainty rests on is also a relative reality, but why do some have more or less reality in their lives?

The perception game makes distant things appear very close, and vice versa. A melody may appear more tuneful one day, rather than another day. Part of oneself says one is lacking in this way, you have fooled yourself, but one can look at oneself in a naked way, stripped of one’s situation and call it truth. Nevertheless, the situation is the truth, and the truth is of the situation, and the situation in one’s story of life: one connects past and present travels to create this mesh of a blur – I exist, because I feel life.

381

It is painless to reflect on one’s life, because life always points to itself, as we come from life our essence will always take us back to life; this is also an important aspect of tantric sexuality. One can also be drawn towards a experience of naturalism, as we come from life we also need to express the qualities of nature through a personal experience of naturalism, whether it be a natural expression of life by sitting on a wall: the experience of naturalism meaning a pure simplicity with life that points back to itself.

382

On sanity and order.- One can also find sanity in life by observing the order that one does things, or perhaps how books may be placed on a shelf: such a naturalism leads the mind from an untidiness to tidiness, from insanity to sanity.

383

In our assumptions we miss the true processes of life and we sink to a state of deus ex machina, but we must go back to what is obvious, as here is where the stillness, or seriousness that we need awaits for us: many times do we walk past the answers to the questions of the future.

384

The key to improvisation is a preparation of free association. If so, is there a psychological angle towards improvisation?

385

What is obvious, only one thing and that is nothing is obvious, and that the wheels of life are turned by repetition, and non-repetition?

386

A secondary design for life.- In such changing circumstances, one desires also the simple technique of living, for there are many things that can betray one, or take one’s integrity; one also needs a spare strategy, a Plan B. The truth is that one is living in a vision thing because one has listened perhaps more to oneself than others, but either way a second design for life is a wise investment into one’s nature. Or with other words a consideration of the other you if say perhaps one’s life had gone another way, though the crossroads are probably not the obvious one’s but they are probably things of accident that have occurred in life, for this reason a second possibility in life should support a Plan B, which would be a walking stick to one’s present view, as we all have a Plan A. One has to consider what if my life went differently, where it would have happened. One may assume that I am taking about money, or what people mean by ‘having money’ which is wealth, but one has to consider that one’s wealth in Plan A is the same as one’s wealth in Plan if one assumes that wealth is an internal quality:

Inner quality (inner pathos)=External quality (wealth)

If Plan A rests on Plan B, then what does Plan B rest on, but on one’s expression!

387

Living is about engagement with life, and if there is despair, one is separate from life, though one may have a strong social life: gradually a union with life develops. The exercises of such an engagement with life are the challenges of life – all problems have such an entrance, and they need not have an exit.

388

The scent of being.- Thought without thought becomes dry, for thoughts suffocate without breath. One needs the spaces in life, they are an essential emptiness, for what is being alone – thus the essence becomes closer to the essence and hence one creates oneself, refusing to be a reflection of others; receiving temperamental and transparent moods, walking free from competing rooms.

389

The Individual being does not have general desire, but an individual desire, though the corruptions such as lust, anger, greed etc. belong to the world of general desire and they will be better accepted than Individual desire; the vices also carry the support of the local population. Be the people my reflection in the lake one desires but a reflection that gives advantage to living, in our climate it seems that such a matter is forbidden and made to be seen as the forbidden apple of the Garden of Eden: once what was forbidden took life, the forbidden truth gives back life – one finds the lost feeling. The common consciousness dissolved into the sub-collective consciousness – separation within unity, a diffused heart of good within diffused light, a control weakned by surrender.

390

Why does the wind of things blow our being in such a direction? Alternatively, what is the furnace in which I process in this direction? In addition, possibilities can make us linger, so keep romancing the stone, as we are guided instantly by inner limits from our lightest to our heaviest decisions through all weather.

391

Truth and humbleness.- The truth is that truth is like water, one can never hold it in one’s hands. One must seek the essence of truth, then water is ice, but one must keep it there, for if one wants to see it flow, it will also flow out of one’s hands.

392

Karmic doubt.- One merely confronts what one faces, and what is behind of oneself is lost. One realises dreams, and what pressures the soul, like dreams of life, living is pursued we easily become lost, and moments are measured and steps in life – how can we gauge such a distance! Doubt is perhaps as deep as the ocean, but the idea of becoming is not progress, but taking steps in doubt: sinking to depths, freeing one from form of life and one simply desires the revelation of oneself; but be my uncertainty a guide: one walks to the fog.

393

Too asleep in sleeping or too awake in living.- People fear weariness because one walks away from the reality of our knowing or the acknowledged reality of the senses to a vagueness of the world where truth is weak and whispers loud. In the place that is also a weary reality as it is void of context and perspective one simply drinks from life in its diluted form and this why freshness is a virtue: one must rest when rest is needed.

394

We are all slow philosophers.- Many only realise when it is too late, and progression is lost, thus living is also about timing and pace. Though the whole process of living is lost if one is late to realise, as many ordinary people reveal some truth or go into the depths, but the truth may come too late and may not have helped in the process of living - they have betrayed themselves. One may be close to many others, some close to their work, whether it is undemanding or difficult, but is it being close to life?

395

Attitude \At"ti*tude\, n. [It. attitudine, LL. aptitudo, fr. L.
aptus suited, fitted: cf. F. attitude. Cf. {Aptitude}.]
1. (Paint. & Sculp.) The posture, action, or disposition of a
figure or a statue.
[1913 Webster]

Attitude.- One has to express the process of expressing life - for one must also learn to be a closed book . With attitude one expresses generally, put it is a perspective over accurate expression. Many prefer attitude to expression, but one does rely on the other. Statues display more of the attitude of a person, rather than a portrait of a person; statues are more lasting than a painting, which are like attitude and is more connected to first expressions. People of bad first expressions may be non-expressive people of attitude, for one needs to be centred and not just grounded through expression and attitude.

396

The default life.- There is a question of doubt over negative, and positivism as negativity is associated with positivism – one feels nothing in most cases whether one is bored or not; one simply does what one normally does normally. In most cases, others stimulate us, by their presence creating not really a collective unconscious ness, but a default collective, which is not unconscious, but a default vibe of humanity. In many cases a path of struggle towards truth may lead a struggle against untruth, which can bring negativity…thus the default vibe is a cushion.

397

One has to wonder at the depths of the imagination, it is no small event to sink to the measures of oneself. One inevitably finds what simply one needs to be able to continue and recover. Thus by putting onto oneself one builds up the sensitive strength of the imagination – being the hidden place where one's private philosophy exists: but the mind publicly proclaims it self like a window. One does not betray oneself one seeks a sound resolution to life and work, thus such inner work projects itself onto life like a star from the ecstasies.

398

One has to wonder quietly, or a going back to oneself, one has to study to look inside as if one was lifting a box over something. This is more than just a bow to oneself, more than a self-greeting but about determining a new place in oneself, but it is not for others, it is the idea of self-ethics, or the standards of being oneself. As a magician has things hidden to the crowd and this is the private philosophy where one shelters in this inner sanctity.

399

The crystal life.- One designates to oneself for one requires strength, but nothing fixes, for others only reflect oneself in varying degrees; the coming back to oneself is further a returning to the river. Whether one returns to some holy book, or a song it don’t matter for these are referencing to one. Though it is not a simple fear to face oneself, but one is only one's friend and enemy because the inner buttons are confusing, thus one may look at a crystal ball, but the earth itself is a crystal ball, one sees some things in life that connects other things to life, every week something catches one's eyes, but one is looking at others.

400

Everyday something passes us by, we notice changes in how we look or how we perceive, but something is always lost. For we live like a fire, and some coal is consumed, but experiences are not the coal, but the fire, we have only to return to the uncontaminated experience of ourselves.


401

Long term excitement over short term excitement, or not selling oneself for a moments worth of glory.- There must be a necessity to live under one’s own rationale of reason, for clarity is self-reason, self-expression, self-driven, self-minded, self-reasoned, self-service and self-contentment; having no formula is the path, with or without habits. The formula is the stream, nothing is projected that is of value, but without the stream of consciousness, and the Individual is by no means found, but it is the Individual that connects to the consciousness, and thus one is freed from doubt. One finds another being deeper inside, and sheds the outer layer: the positive skin becomes the negative skin.

It is a question of which layer one values, but the Individual finds naturalness within the progress. Whereas fake Individualness simply pretends the outer layer is the inner layer, but life has depth beyond public statistics: the will governs itself well enough through its path, and does not need disguise or shade – one has only to take a few steps back, but still to face forwards.

402

The aesthetics of one’s nature.- One desires everything; except one has forgotten how to impress oneself, when one was new it was enough to be pleasing. To impress oneself is a return to the retreat of oneself, a bliss beyond the roars of ordinary life, a defence from the hurricane of formal stoicism, and systematic argumentation: when the free flow of life is lost – one pleases others by impressing oneself, take courage.

403

One is too obvious to get what one wants.- You may over-extend and feel ever-reaching for something; perhaps to find that things just appear a little away in the distance, and one is constantly getting for things, the whole thing seems to extend beyond one’s reach. Thus, one exerts away from what is normality, though one does not run away from the normal but it is an investigation of diverse normalities. One should try to extend oneself through the necessary means, but ultimately a touching or reaching of other things, represents a desire to touch or reach one’s essence: for one has little courage to meet one’s house of thoughts and reflections.

404

How does one desire within desire, or what is the subjectiveness of subjectiveness? Though fashion is a pretentious form of subjectiveness, as fashion tries more to express subjectivness, it is perhaps a step back or sideways from subjectivity.

How do we pose in life, not physically, but to ask again how do we pose our essence in life? This will reflect on our future, as good private investigations should lead from exaggeration to moderation. Further these investigations will diffuse our limits of order in order to rebuild them by giving ourselves confidence by controlling one’s resources and finding humility in spirit, as many things done with humility are good resources for a careful beginning: then fullness becomes emptiness, acceptance becomes rejection, lightness become heaviness and positivity become negativity!

405

The most boring inner combat.- When life becomes dull, inspiration will always comes from the least expected places – though inspiration can also be bought. The truth is that there is dullness within; the dullness is not forced onto oneself and of life, but off oneself. The question is more of are we worthy enough to be inspired, one’s dullest aspects commit oneself to ground level: for a faint spirit assumes too quickly.

406

On not losing oneself into many things.- We must distil ourselves for one is too diluted; it is a good way to make one simple again, rather than to subtract from one’s life. For one cannot travel, if so many thoughts and feelings have to be carried, thus by going deeper into oneself one becomes more concentrated. So the question is if one makes oneself simpler, or into an essence of a few drops, would not these drops weigh greatly, but one must distil oneself to a drop then, and to continue to distil oneself again - yes, the very weight of the drop: then one has found oneself.

407

As our lives constantly rise and fall with the tides of living, we are tapped on our backs, ‘Are we not seas!’ Thus, one wishes to take life further, for it is the worst feeling to have things gone passed. So much is buried in the vaults of our unconscious, in such depths, thus ponds also believe themselves to be sea’s for their depths sink like a well to the depths, though who would use such a well as drinking water, though it may bring up much water!

408

One must be true to oneself, for the truth will lead – as one walks through life with the head leading, which is called Primary Control, an exercise used in the Alexander Technique, thus truth also leads one’s existence. Still one must sense what one cannot sense, it is wrong to feel right, for one also follows the moral truth. For this point, there is no reason whether to check, or judge oneself in the light of the world if one’s aim is righteous. Many times people are full of doubt, and they need to feel right, and they become judgemental, but they judge themselves through their need to be right. They reason out there rightness to evade the idea that perhaps they are not right but are drawn through anger, and envy, or of the lower aims of justification: one does no swim to the other shore, but better to dive to the depths where one struggles to see the hidden shore.

409

On moving on in life.- One must realise that every life is in a cycle, things are not just in a certain way. The principle about life is development, one becomes full, then one develops to a new state, and in this new state; what was once full is now empty. The contents of a full cup are only half the cup of the new cup, this is how life develops, whether one progresses in marriage or riches is not significant, because there is only one progression. One always hopes with regret, because moments pass, but as all such memorable moments from the past are so well cherished simple because they are known to us, so why are they understood to us, but through the repetition of them, consider memories of a place in childhood that involved a repetition, and consider how they compare to moments that had less of a value of repetition but could be a better memory. Memories that have greater repetition in our past considerably increase the fondness of the memory. So why is this, the truth is that repetition has a cyclic quality, and in essence this is the style of life. Thus there is a joy in repetition as it is a part of the cyclic nature of life which expresses the idea that life is about progressing from a cup, to a bigger cup, but what the cup contains is not of financial or romantic progression, but a progression of the substance of life.

410

Too much entertainment.- We desire the commercial life of designer love and hate, but the purpose of a life is not to entertain, or impress, or to be entertained or impressed. Such is the dizzy height of illusion, one cannot live on such a mountain of illusion, where the air is thin. But here one fills oneself with things that are not of one, but the things of others. And hence one feels numb, for one can be entertained, but entertainment cannot replace life in this thin air. One eventually has to walk down the mountain of illusion, and what waits is simply the fresh feeling and breeze of oneself.

411

If I be judged by others about others.- One has to wonder above and below wonder as casualness can betray oneself. Though one can have no exaggeration with oneself, but with others exaggeration is permitted, as others are of further perspective. As distance needs the perspective of binoculars, that clears a path to things that are far from us, but one does not need exaggeration with oneself because one is oneself, one is already there!

412

Sometimes the shadow grows, and one fights life one to one.- One can only win in a spirited sense - if one is free to lose; though in the industry of life to lose is not just to lose a credit, but it costs one's spirit. And the greatest fight is not in the ring but outside the ring i.e. with life but without the cheer. Thus life expands, but as the nature of life is contraction, all great increases in life, are basically a fight against contraction for expansion, thus one pushes the outer walls.

413

There is no idealistic life, as if one has too many ideas – ideas will lose harmony.- Ideas are amoral, for they are tools. So where do ideas come? Nevertheless, from the light of the soul is their path written to us, in this furnace, in the very fires below the chaos of the unconsciousness. Ideas tend to dissolve in life and to lose form in the formless self, we follow many ideas but as they exist without form, we are not opened to them. Ideas are basically made from decisions, in the essence we find the wind where decisions are fathered, thus does the Individual lead their path.

A quote from Soren:

Alas, in men’s fear-ridden rushing together into a crowd (for why indeed does a man rush into a crowd except because he is afraid!)link

414

Gothic values.- Every day one has to grasp, or catch something fresh – if one cannot one has to twist and turn something, to make it strange: as strangers are seen as new...

415

There has no desire for life, but for the expressions and feelings of life, but in itself life can only be measured by our privacy in life; and here lies the deepest meaning in our life: as casual as it be.

416

Not all advancement can be measured, and it can be difficult to see progression in others; making it more necessary to value subtle progression – one wakes up from the sleeping crowd and simply walks to what one’s dreams point to.

417

Pushing the boundaries of our inner experience.- In the questionable abyss of ourselves where we feel the most alone, and others are not seen. An inner silence prompts us to play hide and seek in a gaming mist to melt the ice of such glaciers and hear we approach the meaning of why we exist: we seek sanctuary in the holy ground of the self.

418

One does not need such waves of aphorism, perhaps one can get by with a little push and pull through life, but it is easier to drift to the lower depths of existence. Such wonderings of aphorism exercise the posture of the consciousness. Here one does a duty towards the self, though the world will turn away. The expression of the self is an understanding of the duty of the self and is the essence that really turns away from the world.

419

There must always be a returning to one’s self, or a feeling of home – a place for a natural sense of warmth. Though in an alien place we find that the natural sense of comfort is actually a feeling of being safe, but it is not the comfort of the seat belt, it is safeness of knowing something well visually, and in the audio. However, the warmth of a place like home is not in the building, though there is an atmosphere of a place, but it does exist in us. One may be repelled, or feel fear by this exercise in solitude while in this alien place for one has to cross paths that one has not crossed, and for this reason, one cannot see the paths, it is about path creation: a skill, which belongs to children, and is lost to adults. Listen to the shouting of children, feel it, though to hear their shouting we are simply irritated by the noise of their shouting, in this shouting one senses the energy of path creation.

420

One knows one’s path not from the fruit of the path, as many have seen a bad road turn into good roads, but by the shadow that is projected on the travels: be it dim or full?

421

Inspired to adjust to the cold.- The system of inner energies has been clarified by Freud into hidden forces, called the unconscious to the subconscious and conscious, but what makes a thing reveal itself, from the unconscious. Does a consciousness contain warm thoughts, and is this warmth not interest; for things that have attraction and occupy our living are more warm and welcome to us. Thus, heavy thoughts would be colder, and further from us, and lost to us as they have little interest. Therefore, this is how inspiration comes, when the conscious energies are too hot, and one is required to think deep. It is also for this reason that obsessions make one feel uneasy for one has gone away from the good weather of everyday custom to the desert, and hence people are quick to satisfy the obsession; being increasingly intolerant of the desert weather.

As philosophers are accustomed with the depths, they catch more from the unconscious, though most do get a shudder from the depths, as if the doors of the consciousness are knocked by the unconsciousness, and many do take note of their feelings, or it may a change in attitude. So if the unconscious is our real self, or closer to our real selves than it is as Freud said, our I.D is contained in the unconscious. As philosophers are accustomed with the depths, they catch more from the unconscious, but hence if they fear not cold thoughts, why should they fear cold emotions wrapped around in their depths hidden in the unconsciousness entangled with thoughts from memories from the past, and hesitation and hope from the future.

422

One does not need such waves – one can simply exist in pure thought which is free from cause and effect, by not thinking about action: one has a spiritual duty.

423

One must wonder at the energies that lie towards the essence, for they represent our primal energies. Beneath the unconscious, we find a place to rest: a place where our reason knows no language and is free from all nationalities. I submit to such energies and my passion finds root.

424

What stops our flow, the noises of people? The path to becoming is a path without flow, one follows with increasing distraction. Nevertheless, the path downwards only seems easier, because one travels faster: we are what our spirit travels into.

425

Some people imagine away their lives when reality runs dry, we happen because we are, and not because many applaud us.

426

Breath of life.- What is it that drives us, what grips us, which management do we pursue, and how do we choose these directions? In times when we need a grip on the oars of our nature, our sense of direction loses itself, for we cannot simply follow our interests; in times of a need of focus we lose a sense to decide based on concerns. We eagerly pursue cares when there is no immediate obligation for a sense of direction in one's life, but because we follow our interests when we feel our interests we know the directions needed in the still moments of living. By being true to our interests we are true to our life, interests give us the gravity to navigate on the inner paths: the private paths, our feeling of destiny within our breath!

427

Style is the structure of knowledge i.e. some things need more thinking and some things do not deserve much thought. As conclusion is the final step of thinking, it is also a general proof that one is actually thinking about something. There is also the matter of thinking management, one needs such a thing, rather than just thinking without any aim, one must manage one’s thoughts to work things out, for knowledge needs a framework.

FERDINAND: Your ladyship is ignorant what it is.

PRINCESS: Were my lord so, his ignorance were wise,
Where now his knowledge must prove ignorance.
I hear your grace hath sworn out house-keeping:
Tis deadly sin to keep that oath, my lord,
And sin to break it.

Shakespeare > Comedies > Love's Labour's Lost > Act II, scene I

428

I will stay on in the same quest as how I was bought up, but my problems are the same too.- We are not endless in the possibilities of our differences, for we can only be so different as we belong to the same species. Differences do not reveal themselves in conflict against each other, for the psychology of the mob is being too the same. The battle cry is not for nationality, and love, the battle is with oneself, but it is revealed with cruelty in the hostility and not in the hospitality to others. Cultures that live in hostility talk about too many differences, though it may be a different religion and wealth-wise too, whereas the faith and distribution be the same of the different cultures!

429

One pays a great price for empathy in being oneself, for to find empathy in being oneself means one is not being oneself. Empathy does work best with problems of being oneself, rather than actually being oneself; this explains why people end up in an unsure place in life.

430

A good aphorism must be open to different interpretations - not to mystify, but to bring different perspectives to the whole. For a stick can be many things, and aphorisms are like a stick, it can be placed over something as a means of decoration, or it can serve an elderly, or be a weapon: it depends how it is picked up.

431

One only finds oneself in the fog.- There will always be doubts, the certainty of life is false, but the pleasure of doubt, is the drama of life and death. What are doubts? Nevertheless, the passion that goes beyond facts, finding warmth in the chills of cold analysis – there is fault with knowledge, for knowledge is only what is conferred, but not what is there.

432

The person that succeeds with everything that they want to do, by being zealous in their life will also be the most bored person in the latter part of their life. Then one must learn to live without aim, which is the aim of aims: to escape desire through fulfillment. This is quite different from Zen philosophy which reevaluates fulfillment.

433

We represent our purpose.- We need not attempt to find a will to live; we wake up because we have a will. However, we survive because the biggest ambition is the smallest ambition. Small ambitions are actions, but big ambitions are not a will but only a plan, our will is not felt but it is behind our pulse, it is why we breathe…

434

What is the meaning of purpose, but to find purpose? If we say it, we say what are we to do...

However, aims are not purpose, but they are an expression of purpose. It is the most important things that are represented by purpose. It is the truth in ourselves that gives us the reason to have purpose, but then again the highest purpose, is simply being; the only true haven for the consciousness. And allowing the movement around of ourselves, to be a purpose for that movement: for one gravitates within oneself.

435

Inner galaxy.- Thoughts orbit to one’s gravity, the weight of the gravity is the consciousness, and the mind our galaxy, oh sun – my glow, my soul. Other planets also tag on in certain orbits, which are fate and characterize our destiny. Thus, I am more than my weight: there is this hidden work.

436

Destiny of destiny.- Sometimes big things become small, and small things become big – sometimes we simply fall into the marshes – how can we avoid the quick sand. The truth is that one should not wish for easy or difficult hope. On can find so many things in a mood, but one also needs worth to meet the sun half-way, but balanced equally with humidity, as many times one has to duck. Deeper in oneself one senses invisible strings to invisible mechanisms, I do not philosophize; I look up.

437

Who needs to ignore the whispers that fear not to come from the soul? The highest spirit is also the lowest spirit; the shadow is also the sun spirit, and the movement between creations of low and high. And it is the nature of my breath of aphorism to express with so many doors, as too many angles can lead to misapprehensions. Yet, we do not know why or where words appear in front of us as everything exists as we seem to exist. To add reasons to words could be to add strength; yet, many see depth as vagueness through shallow eyes: yet we all share the same sound, and dance to the same wine.

438

There is no question passed the scheme of becoming, not by definition but by duty. The integrity of the soul is that it contains a question mark, thus the mind holds a desire for the essence, but this holding is a fragile holding of it. It is a long wondering and aphorisms can pass like seconds or days, but what else leads to a feeling of destiny, what wind blows one to the skies.

439

There is the natural understanding of matters, but many times things are understated and overstated, responses come from the peace when one is halve awake, and one demands very little from anything.

440

Self-indulgence.- Night will always wait for us; it is the day that does not wait. To lead one is to be, and to others we are something else that resembles them, we can only lead our selves. We can only sink in our own mud; self-indulgence makes our tolerance weak. Such an indulgence of the self is a sideways movement, which confuses the direction of the oars that will the mind.

For day does not follow day, light does not indulge, all things need direction, it is unproblematic to slip and skid in life. Unless one makes self-indulgence into a work of effort, then one pretends to skid around the corners of life! Through self-indulgence we become diluted, and our stream will run smoother, but a diluted stream of such weak tolerance will lead nowhere in particular.

441

Thus one is led by the subtle forces of Individual motivations, we consider ourselves only for ourselves. And in this we make light steps, the path shines, and then one knows this is the path where one's calling will lead.

CHAPTER 5 : PASSION OF BEING

442

Life will always desire meaning, even in its lowest form, the cell - it will reach for something, consider an ant, which direction does it move? Though the bigger the organism, movement is not so simple, one moves in one direction in order to gain more freedom in another direction...

443

The feeling or passion inside one's self is the strength of their destiny, and the will is a vice as a means to an end...passion drifts through one's styles in optimal format.

444

After the harvest of private depths, new seeds blossom; the hypocrisy of youth of ignorance is swept and the force of fire is felt with a blossoming power.- As we become older our passion slips, but the veil slowly is blown by the wind of age. As the veil of ignorance slips we desire to be gripped by the reality of life, for experience teaches us to look again. The sun sets in our hearts, our privacy blossoms to our public portrait, as the innocence of beauty is born from the passion of the heart (for the breeze of life can also awaken us).

445

True passion never decays, it approaches to one's door as a stranger, the stranger enters, after reflections in private atmospheres. With passion one never crawls, a person is their passion, but a will to power is a steady boat in an emotionally confused storm: the adult becomes the heart child, thus the stranger whispers.

446

Passion is the feeling of the soul that unites our thinking to our feeling – its feeling is the proof of this. When felt one seems to experience a time which senses many experiences from the past, though not sentimental, from the present, but not corrupt – one is ready to dive into the future as if it were a lake.

447

Meeting the sun halve way.- It is not by the will that we extend our activities; our identity helps us to meet life. The identity of a person wakes up the person not through the will, but as a bath, or shower wake us up, it freshens the soul, another day becomes a new day. The identity seduces us into a washed perception; the identity does this by washing the dust on the same old perception, we rarely know our perception, as our perception is a filter, which allows us to simplify life, we do not know our perception in its pure form as it quickly becomes lost to us in the dust of the day, and its intereactions with other perceptions.

Another way of passing through life is a will, but one cannot create a will without a destined place or purpose, but many have a purpose, or proposition without a will or true road to it.

448

Being in peace should be reflected to one's tolerance to oneself - one should find a peace that seeds an anti-violence philosophy: there are many different forms of peace, but the act of violence is only of one kind with varying degrees.

Aphorism 448 comes from this post, I made in my IPL blog.

449

Play has no direct purpose, but to lighten up our purpose: it is how we reason with our ‘what ifs' and perhaps because we are stirred. Through play we call into play other forces, and find solace, comfort, and contentment within ourselves. Hence we further ourselves beyond generalizations, as we have learned to accept feelings such as acceptance, and ignore the multiple interplay of sub-current feelings which reflect us in our inner glow.

450

On the love of a couple.- The passion between a man and a woman may not be love, but of a basic erotic feeling in nature. Though the understanding of the erotic varies from the East where it is seen as an objective erotic which favors proposed marriages, whereas in the West the erotic is favored in a subjective form, based on a deeper value on the romantic sensuality of the relationship: only passion can join lovers, for destiny control’s ones wealth.

451

The existence of passion is important because it so expressive of the souls want. It is of good custom to realize the unconscious currents that lie under our everyday feelings. A good distraction works only so well, but distractions have a hope, in rebounding us to a place we fear to go - we may commit to a sacrifice.

452

A couple of steps back, please.- Our basic dimension is not our present reality, as we lay in so many hidden colours, identity is layered with identity as a rubbish tip, but so used we are to the condition we betray ourselves and feel so satisfied. Passion is a path that starts when our reason stops, for our reason is limited for it lies within the parameters of the illusion of our realities. Nevertheless, passion is the question that cannot be felt; it is purely the feeling of movement inside of us, the part of us that remembers the way back, which places markers in our journey.

Therefore, what is the most basic reality? The place where we sit and say; ‘This is it? Though I do not know what it is?' The most basic reality, the spiritual realm, when our consciousness lays down on our own bed, it rests like a child: the still reality beckons.

453

Passion is not the energy of oneself, or even a sublime energy; as it stands here in this context: passion is the nature of one’s energy – one only needs passion if one has passion. For the nature of one’s being is gripped, life flows, but one needs to defy the naturalness of doing things in the day to get by. I think therefore I am, but what is one, if one creates a life through thought, one simply becomes a reflection of one’s thoughts. I exist, because I sense a purpose in the pathos of my density of energy...for it is the nature of an energy that creates a particular kind of energy. And one finds a flow through the day that defies naturalness...

454

One has to ask the question, what is the question? If the answer is the passion of being, what is the question?

455

The purpose of individuality is to lose oneself of individuality.- Individuality is a natural state of growth, which has been made as a selfish device for personal growth. For we live in societies and not in caves, though friendship favors individuality, the union and partnership between two people - the will to individuality loses it's momentum and turns into a collective individualism, or an extended individualism out of which families are born. Where the extended consciousness becomes greater than the sum of the two individual consciousnesses of the relationship of a couple. The individual spirit is ever growing, but is never nurtured - as a couple one gains the extended consciouses, which does not grow and is dependent on the individualities of the two people of the couple. By choosing marriage early, one can only have a very limited extended consciousness, without allowing individual consciousness to rise. For if an individuality has not really bloomed, perhaps one is confused by the fires of the sexual drive - how can such a marriage blossom, no matter how perfect the other person is?

456

True passion is never felt, for one becomes the passion.- The objectivity of passion is to have a will in life – one desires a certain relationship with truth, one simply follows this old stream. Though the weakest paths have the least objection in reality, but the true face towards life is lost. Passion is a method of dealing with natural resistance to a life interweaved with truth: generating the confidence that confides a depth like destiny. One has to realise that true passion also needs a deeper confidence; rather than a volume of confidence but a confidence of pathos.

457

The desire for seriousness is only a perception of a helpful attitude; forced seriousness leads to a forced perception, which only strengthens the vagueness of life. In desired seriousness one reads the lines so well, and is also tripped too by these lines. In seriousness one does not understand in a serious way, for if one is being seriousness, how can one be more? It is only in an opened state that holds what is true to oneself can one be serious, but being serious does not mean that one is serious, for either one is serious or one does something seriously.

The seriousness of the film Citizen Kane was made not from seriousness:

Seriousness is the only refuge of the shallow.
Oscar Wilde

458

The nature of passion.- Niether belonging to our feeling, or thinking world. But passion appears to be the source of our thoughts and feelings - our unnoticed self, but the first cause of our wakeful nature where the duality of thought and feeling are one, but is niether. Ever guiding through intuition, its reason is reason enough.

459

Passion is our live or perhaps soul battery, it is also related to beliefs. But what is truth, and how is it related to passion? Non truth gives very quickly, and one's lust is content to see a result, but it is due to the desire for a result, or living with short-term excitement: one is too efficient in life. Real truth is not efficient, it takes as much time as it takes, for either one gives a thing the time, or one does not: the proof is one's passion, or how it is ignored...One goes home and away, but when that something is felt with true passion: a pathos of suffering is felt.

460

Passion is about destination, and the path to the destination, it is also about knowledge, or the process of the path. To be passionate one must be seeing from within, not distracted - but destined one projects the internal light into the darkness... and another destination creates another destination.

461

Unique paths in life.- One seeks without desire to find anything, hoping for an insight into a subterranean pathos: our uniqueness may the key to unlock ourselves. Such and such flows our way, what is close becomes distance, and distant things become close. For our lives are built on roads we cannot see, one goes one way, but different roads have different relationships between cause and effect; a unique relationship between cause and effect...

462

One gathers much from the world, but to seek is not to find. When one becomes still, one is seeked.

463

We define happiness as no change.- An overpowering wave of passion crashes on an edgy shore of rocks; in the wayward distance a muted light comes from the foggy atmosphere of a lighthouse. Some ships turn away, but this is how life resides around of us - unnatural, and unwelcome. One looks from another view in the ship, thus as wisdom is related to one's view of life, or perspective of life also is altered, and as wisdom changes the truth also changes. One meets risks in life during the storm to free oneself from shackles that press risk in later weeks.

464

Business can exploit people, but ambition can exploit its own emotions. One should not complain of the dullness of the senses if the spirit is not sustained. Ultimately it is the dulling of the senses that angle to repressed emotions, hence the psychologist becomes the fisherman, fishing in the waters of the consciousness seeking such repressions.

465

The grip of the heart is dainty in the eyes of a lover, passion leads to a firmer grip of the heart, the inner turnings of life. The souls interface which is the medium between our inner senses and the sensual universe, it is this kind of consciousness. Sometimes it is as if the soul desires to leave the body, as one may escape a prison, thus death may salute oneself - the vices are the tools that life itself uses, making us rust.

466

Passion is the enemy of simple living, but simple living is the enemy of life.- Passion is about the forfeit of the heart to all things, though one does not bow but it is about raising oneself. To accept all things, to meet the fear of living is to keep things complex, as dead ends follow simple paths, as with greater possibilities comes passion. With simple building; one may build a pyramid - though one can do nothing more at the top of the pyramid. Passion is about possibilities, the possibility of a path in the infinity, here we have slow growth, and slow healing with greater possibilities, though what is the point of living simply if one goes to a dead end in life.

467

The science of passion is the forgetting of ambition.- In the sensitivity of the soul, is the silence of passion; the quiet giver that also takes. Passion is the heart of patience – thus are steps guided from the present, not to fall in the pits of the darkness of the future, but applied to the politeness of the lightness of the future.

468

We are always thinking the wrong thing.

469

Bravery can only be found within battle, and anxiety with friends.

470

Our doubts question our beliefs.

471

Confusion is an ally if decision making is a skill.

472

If heaven is too predictable it is boredom with silver and gold decorations.

473

The further one thinks the more one demands of oneself.

474

A study in passion only desires the accuracy and honesty behind the sensations that we feel in life.

475

The sensation, and the cause.- What we feel is not our emotions, but the sensations of our emotions. The sensation of ourselves is the derivative of our emotions. Passion is the actual feeling of our emotions without the sensations which are the derivatives of our emotions.

One may contemplate that these sensations would lead to the actual internal emotions, which truly represent our holy emotive presence in life. Our religious activities in life connect to this part of ourselves, and as the sensations are caused by the body, they are a derivative of our passion, and not really a version of our passion. With these sensations we lose the aesthetics of our true feelings, they are a purity of feeling because they exist without sensation.

As music is the sensation, even the written music, or the Raga in Indian music is all still the sensation and not the pure expression. The pure expression cannot be found in music, unless the sensation is changed, and adopted from the original pure feeling. A guitar brings out a sound, as the body brings out a true pure feeling making in into a sensation of our selves.

Though different guitars like different bodies have different sensations, with these feelings of sensations we lose the accuracy of the expression. Many people have recognised that certain feelings expressed by a couple in a heated argument may not be true, but still be valid. True intimacy has to go beyond sensations, to become a collective passion.

476

The sensations of the body are like a well made carpet that stimulate the senses, but look underneath the carpet to see past the patterns, and one will see the passion.
A tired body will see all feelings as tired, a corrupt body will see all things as corrupt, and an awakened body will see all things fresh. The body is a bad amplifier of feelings - most feelings are lost through the body: but through feelings we feel ourselves in life, and living is a feeling above everything else.

477

The unconscious is not where feelings come from, it simply is the place where certain feelings exists that we are not aware of, as we can be conscious of an experience, and we may later become unconscious of the experience. It is usually fear that drives feelings and experiences into the unconsciousness.

478

Anxiety is a fear (of the unknown) or the unknown effects of the influence of others that one does not want to be influenced by, or the people that one finds hard to look at.

479

If thoughts need to be known - feelings need to be felt. How does one feel?

480

Jealousy is like concentrated anger - one plays chess against oneself! Though if one wins against oneself, one will have harmed oneself.

481

Passion is the space between the heart and reason.

482

The anti-naturalist.- The temptation of the world is not the possibility of life (with its opportunities and ambitions) but the love for it. But the love of life has to become before the possibility of it, Rather than the usual day to day observation of not loving life because a reason for a love of life does not exist. Thus one can go against nature - the weed regrets not being a rose, but is ‘happy’.

483

Less than ten percent of life.- Life is not actually about competition, or winning and losing: living life is more about living.

484

Living with passion.- Livelihood is about being drawn to things, there is the gravity of the universe, of planets. There is also our private universe of things, and one must not try to stay, things are always moving to and thro. Not the gravity of mass, but the gravity of living. Living means one is a part of life, and things are always shifting in life. All living things are the tools of life, the tools which life uses to move things in life, thus our emotions are the servers of life; we cannot serve ourselves. Life is about things moving, perhaps elevated thoughts moving to consciousness, or a music record of the past, or to look at somebody’s expression.

One shifts with a smile of a thing from the past, a path to innocence, one looks up, and a path to another smile - a path to something authentic, then one has a slight smile, and this is a path to originality. Life is about living, but living has to feel original - the idea of living is that one is living, and not pretending to live. But more, living needs to feel authentic, one does not want to fake life for living is not about carrying influences, one must suffer from life; this is about being close to living.

485

One desires a space to unite fragments, and to move away from the idea of coming closer or further from things. One needs to be in all things and outside of all things – one exists relative to nothing. I simply need what I need, but passion is for more things, not less things – one feels less with less things – though the Buddhist way is to have less so to feel less, but there is also the idea of having more in a psychological way, to give oneself more through meditation. Even the religious idea of being related to the holy, in either spirit, divination or humidity is to have more: what passion just says is - what is more? And desire for more is less...

486

Cramped up and bottled up in life’s little games.- One desires a space to unite fragments: to move away from the idea of coming closer or further from things. One needs to be in all things and outside of all things – one exists relative to nothing.

Passion is the need of the spirit to move, it is the need to exist in a real way. Thus one asks why am I wrong, not why others are wrong – one affirms oneself without trickery – one is true to one’s spirit: and not drowned by the critical nature of things.

One absorbs, but one does not become a sponge. One reflects but does not become a mirror. One does not become a path of difficulty for others. Everything is simply as it is, one throws everything into the air without the desire for all things to descend into the right place, and one trusts the throwing of things into the air, nothing more and nothing less.

When one’s hands are tied to one’s back one carves one’s way. One can be too happy to be original in life. Thus what is living? I did notice a picture of a fashion model that appeared to come out of the page, she is living! So living is different for different people because they are different, what is living for one person may not be living to another person. To others, different things or places matter in life – it may not be about originality, or cutting a path through stone. Thus life connects to our essence, and the process is living. Though living is not the expression of the essence, for the process of life is not an artistic technique.

487

Things of shape came be sold more easily.- Where does the consciousness of passion lie? Where does the will of the consciousness reside? Passion is the force without form, though our bodies are with form. Perhaps even our souls have form, but passion has no form. It is the part of us without shape. Shape is connected with the eyes, but smoke has a more vague shape, though we can see it.

What is known is known, one cannot have passion meant for something that one knows. Though what is vague and partly unknown has a sense of it, and is more intriguing. To push boundaries helps us to feel passionate because then we explore what is known, and unknown to us.

488

Other people are other people, simply – more or less.- Passion also resembles the coming together of truth and emotion, between word and breath. The breath is the engine of the word, and the word is the consciousness of the mind. The word talks and extends itself to the world, and it is through error we grow, unless we have the luxury of small steps. All one needs is the light to ignite an explosive mixture of truth and emotion, and the simple truth that one who may help you today, may laugh at you tomorrow: one exerts pressure onto oneself to find out what the next step is?

489

Passion is the gravity of our emptiness, or humility, or sense of the spaces between.- There has to be a path, a direction – one has to make choices; I was told that our feelings come from our head, and our fears reside in our body - the moment to moment cause and effect of our feelings reactions to our immediate surroundings, like a pinball machine. So where does passion reside, if it belongs to our real feelings, it will reside in our heads, as it can be in our heads where our real feelings can be worked out, like a courtroom. Though happiness is also about seeing others, one does not want to see a dreadful man be happy, but who is happy, nor see a good man depressed – so I am responsible to the light of humanity, though is my darkness the shadow of such light! But I am not happy, my happiness has not developed – it is a picture that develops slowly, or a painting that waits for the right weather. Goodness in me is not recognised, as it is a goodness that is not relative to others, my goodness is ontological goodness: the pure goodness of the self, as being posed in the lightness and darkness of day.

490

The pure experience of living.- What happens when one does nothing, what is left – should not one experience being oneself... If one cannot experience oneself, than how can one really experience life? So does anybody really experience life, or is it a sensation of colours and sounds, and a sense of the aesthetic? The experience of life is about belonging to life, rather than feeling through life. Living means living in life, or belonging to life, does one belong to oneself? But does one belong to life or oneself, one is attached to life, one does not belong to oneself, one is detached from life - one belongs to oneself. Does one want to belong to oneself….one should neither belong to oneself or to life but to tune oneself to the point when attachment meets detachment?

491

The need for real movement in life has to parallel with some inner movement in life. Though passion does not connect one with movement in the world, but it is the Tao or way of movement: the essence of one’s movement in life. Though this does not represent the relationship of oneself with movement in life, but simply the nature of movement in life: even if one has a good path in life, one also has to consider one’s movement on the path, passion is the movement of the steering oar in life.

492

To fidget away; why is one oneself, or why type in darkness.-The nature of existence is to experience i.e. the passion of being, but what is the consciousness of experience. Though one will always be within the bias of being oneself, but being oneself is a healthy illusion of the loss of one’s reason to live, which is most odd, the time…aesthetic…the reason to believe in oneself…but every reason is exploited as super glue. Every thing that glitters behind the curtain is accused of being too good, whereas being good resides in the common imagination as the mud left by the rain, and not by the reason left by the struggle; which only goes against the idea of I AS ME, AS DOING THIS! Though everything need a reference point, no enemy wants to too defeat the enemy, as no illusion desires a reflection of it’s heart of consciousness as a will desires no substance over the distraction of the soil of it’s heart, or the will of it’s death, in the same way that shallowness causes a reflection that forgets about the reason of being oneself, and even the substance of living, and why one talks to others that are familiar, like being above the the call of one's duty.

493

Last year, next year and the now.- The vision of ourselves has to extend from ourselves, if our vision of ourselves comes outwardly, or more of the scheme of things; then the vision is not an extension of us but a lesser version of ourselves. Few change in their working life’s as if in a trance they eat, work, and play, and after many years they wonder why they are thinking the same thing. Though I am not against being of a faith, or not being of a faith, but a decade can slip away, without leaving an expression or hint of pathos on one’s face. Sure, one can control nothing outside of one’s own sphere: life can be controlled if one plans for it in the following year. So why is this, it is because life exists as certain conditions, and we live in these certain conditions – though control of these conditions is like trying to change the shape of something that has already solidified, but the reality of next year is open to control or influence, as the reality of next year is in a liquid form. As a child cries in simple frustration, also the parent hits the wall trying to change the solid present, better to direct the frustration to the next year: one is where one is because of last year.

494

Live today is what they say – but what is living in the moment, going with what is happening, but what is happening, you are listening, you are waiting, you are wondering about a partner etc – but why is this happening. The present always feels like a scene, as if it is an expression of the past, but past is past, better to think of the following year: this is against the common sense of the day, but what is the point of living in the present when the present is so much a juxtaposition of cause and effect!

495

A good retreat is advancement in strong humility.

496

The mind-stabber type person has political and popular charm.

497

The most defined thing can also be the most limiting thing.

498

It is often said to explain things is to understand these things, but better to understand things that one cannot explain.

499

On the two-option man, who is only less bored when he travels.- What is necessary differs from what is essential, as what may work, and what is probable to work, though many paths and possibilities exist between.

500

The vagueness of philosophy is its freedom.

501

The seed of silence.- Passion is not stillness or movement, but the essence of stillness and movement, where stillness is the same as movement. Nor is it silence, or noise, but it is where noise meets silence, when noise is similar to silence: passion is what the heart feels; it is not the etcetera living that many feel.

502

We need silence to meet ourselves, to take us out of the arena. For silence shows us the world is a reflection of ourselves. Though we also fear the world as a reflection of ourselves, in the arena the world is stripped of all its sensibilities, and the pathos of becoming is damned beyond belief. Though there is no satisfaction knowing that the world is a reflection of ourselves, for all we see in the mirror is the world!

503

Faith in life.- One desires experience, a pure experience of life. Thus one examines the nature of passion, for our experience of life is a reflection of our own passion. But if one is given such an experience of life, one also receives a faith of life. Many people argue about how can they have faith in life with so many confused arguments around locally and globally at the expense of people becoming refugees, but faith in life is about one’s own experience in life, and not about the knowledge of other’s in life. Whether one is going through a decrease or increase in their life, their experience of life would be the same; as the soul’s first expression of life, the passion or fragrance of itself would be the same. In the same way that people have faith in religion because of their experience of religion, one can further the pose in life by having faith in life. One can further one’s purpose in faith, by having faith in life as in well as in religion – for religion first exists in life before the personal faith emerges.

504

Passion is the yearning to seek a path in the stars, to bring the spirit of the heavens to earth. And to lower the shadows of the earth below, but also to sense where the stars and shadows meet, to have a simple sense of existing in harmony; many will find controversy or jealousy(see below) with this!

The nature of jealousy.- Though I have only felt jealousy once, I saw it as a compass to development. Though all were jealous of me, I decided that jealousy was an illusion, so I created an illusion of others being on my side, and this stopped other people from being jealous of me; to defeat one illusion with another illusion. I was once too high in the sense of others, but now I seem too low, by creating a friendly illusion with others - people were not able to bond their hate to me, but the fact is that if somebody was previously jealous of you they would also be the least likely to appreciate you, so from being too high I have become so low to others.

Shakespeare quote:

OTHELLO: O misery!

IAGO: Poor and content is rich and rich enough,
But riches fineless is as poor as winter
To him that ever fears he shall be poor.
Good heaven, the souls of all my tribe defend
From jealousy!

505

Nothing is old, or new including us, age is simply a different medium of expression: a palette of time and space with brushes expressing the pathos of experience.

506

Pure expression.- To express oneself in silence is to dissolve in life.

507

Charm is the radiance of the night, whereas passion is the glory of our sun.- The passion of love is the path of reason - the inner enotional workings: the wonderings of one's shadow, and the dust blown to one's face, or like the shadow of tiredness falling in the evening dew, such are the silent expresisons? There is the poison of charm one is cast in its spell and seduced to a retarded path, their conscience is closed towards pathos, but warmer to the effects and illusions of living; people have to return to that charm: it is an illusion creating an illusion, whereas passion moves not - it is born from silence, or a thing in itself.

508

One does not preach to the hangman, but one preaches to strangers; being is living if one serves oneself for being: it is necessary to live to be!

509

Why knowledge? It is interesting that the aesthetic leaves knowledge far behind, nor does peace of mind haste much for knowledge. But the realm of knowledge lies before, and beyond the aesthetic and harmonic tranquilities, if one desires proof of this - keep wondering, it is more about one’s comparison with others...the other person one walks past; the difference is knowledge.

510

Stupidity is normally confused with quiet contentment, and misfires. The truly stupid who lack contentment, may have more in material terms, and less in terms of wealth: but it is also our valuation of things that makes us wealthy - money cannot touch such a perception.

511

The advice that nobody tells us.- We are all vindicated to ask ourselves quietly, why do we exist: which direction does the wind of change sweep us today? But through creating loud aims, we lose the answer in the weather of our consciousness, for such an answer is always whispered, each day has an aim that is true to ourselves and independent of our reality – but leads deeper to our authenticity of belonging to life.

512

Take this life,
‘Free’ it is,
Fading words,
The grip of life!

Take this heart,
Wonder far,
Sail away,
Stream me to the sea.

Simply guide,
With ease,
Passionate soul,
To soul-reverb.

Nothing - hear,
Hear silence,
Far and wide,
From shore to shore.

Everything will vanish,
It will appear!
The many years,
Yet songs sound the same.

Fragrances enchant,
Love blossoms:
Follow away,
Prisons flower to prisms.

Forward marching-
One to three,
Griped with life,
Channel thoughts like mists.

Imagine
Flow from me
Imagine…
Nights ear to me?

513

One must adapt to the strangeness of the world, for it can make one feel strange. Sometimes one must submit to everything, to bow down to everything. I simply exist, or my passion really exists because it is the emotional perception of this world.

514

It would be wise to focus on social individuality; so far I have concerned myself with individuality in the sense of self, or things of relative to the sense of self. One must find things of relative to the sense of others – this kind of individuality is called uniqueness...one may lose one’s thoughts in a crowd?

515

Against natural determinism.- It is difficult to image eternity in life, though there many senses of eternity in life. An instance is cause and effect, effect is not something that follows, as determinism believes to dissimilar extents with angles. The primitive form of cause and effect in the natural environment is that of reaction, or reaction with pathos, such as response, but there is a near sea between no-reaction and reaction, between no-response and response. This sea is not a drop of water under a microscope, but many cause and effects of the subconscious, as memories can be hidden, there is also a near sea of hidden cause and effect in reacting, or responding to things.

516

Tell me here, what is written – simply an aphorism, or a quest for knowledge, or sublime answers, is it the passion of your ear, the realisation that answers belongs to no one, and everyone?

517

Five years ago she seemed to have a spark of purpose, but now grandmother seems to have no purpose, or direction, or angle on anything. As with extreme mental and physical disorders that seem to limit lives or the terminally ill, whereas one may feel so extended even with full mental and physical resources of living – their purpose must be hidden in their passion.

518

Raise one’s hand if one is here in life.- One has to glimpse beyond what is necessary, meaning to seek beyond what one is told to enquire, to oppose the direction that is suggested by the voices that only desire to be listened!

Why is one cautious to one’s mirror - for a mirror is a reflection of logic? There is no science to logic – it is because one wants to see the truth. The truth is only just under the narrative of one’s doings of life. The cause of life is too coarse, one’s reflection - the reflection of life – in the oneness of being; glimpsing the shadows of one’s direction and purpose in life in one’s feeling of others.

519

The aesthetics of nature is the atmosphere needed by nature to survive, it serves no purpose to us. We are not really drawn to aesthetics but the spirit of survival, or the effect of aesthetics; in this way we are also drawn to passion. For passion represents the atmosphere we need to survive, but it serves no purpose as music also does not serve a purpose: but purpose is more seen in the effects of music.

520

The senses must reach to the divine .- To wonder at the world….the wonderful life comes from a vital roughness (the see-saw of being able to work and the ability to move on in work) that cripples many so easily, with directions unknown, and tides of recessions that appear as if it dropped from a black hole! With sudden grasps of air after catching a glimpse of somebody with the banner “average morality”. What direction is life taking one to?

Also of the character there are unknown and hidden problems of sensitivity, roughness and hidden diseases. What is the nature of this reality that we live in? It is more than a feeling, but a substance of spirit whether it is a shallow stream or a river. This is one’s world, and the painting on one’s wall in the room of life’s perception is one’s morality. Thus it is not life that has decayed, but one’s morality; it is not one’s health that has decayed but one’s morality. The workplace has fights for virtues, as they can be tools or wands in living – there may even be a virtue that brings luck: one head thrusts itself against another head; the average morality is very thin indeed.

If the truth be allowed to flow from this vessel, it has to be written that the senses are the hands of the soul. The senses….our purpose has to extend beyond eating and sleeping (in different places)….the senses must reach to the divine, if life does not lift oneself, one has to lift oneself. One is always making the decision between the exalted high and the distorted low - almost a country beween them?

521

Life plainly exists, as it is the energy to connect to, one tunes oneself to life. People expecting life to think for them will search far for empathy with this for life being another person, though many project this view by naming it God. Two problems with this view are that God is outside of life, and the idea of living, and the second is that as God does not live in any sense that we do we are not capable of empathy with God. Anyway it is an illusion that life is alive, even suffering and pain are illusions, for they disappear when a certain realisation or lesson in life is found. It is true, countless are content, but aims are created by assumptions in one’s advantages and misfortunes: if one is content one must create new aims, and expand the horizons; but upwards also.

522

Artistic conditioning.- In such a world one cannot have organized expression if one is trying to express something so untidy i.e. if the expression is not intense, or nosy enough. On the other side of the level - if expression is too noisy, error in expression could result. If expression is not untidy one may have a fear of life becoming chaotic, such people may be drawn to tidiness in their thinking or actions in an extreme way: messed-up world, but tidy expression.

523

In the sureness of the day, where pathos meets poetry one opens to the world (of reason) with attempts (in a visionary path) to distil oneself – hoping that such a distilled version of oneself can be known. Though when the world becomes still, it seeks also the same thing from me, to know itself, and to understand itself.

524

Low.- Being low, feeling low, but low in what context, of sensation, disposition or liveliness. Is happiness…. is it some kind of pleasing high representing a crystallization of positivism, or warmth of feeling, or a social life, is it ambition, or having more money? It may be the case of looking at a picture histogram of a good picture, which is low and high in the correct places, or as a song compressed in the right places to allow the harmonics to work. This a dodgy area, a girl said to me a couple of days ago; or are people low in this place because they have less money, and no jobs: such things however are essential for happiness, for they can make one’s shadows appear longer.

525

Personal reflections on terrorism.- Extremist terror groups are marginalized more by their beliefs, and concerns rather than springing from some hotpot of collective belief gone perverse. The reason why perspective is lost, is that extremists rely sometimes on terror; though many extremists do become purists. This relationship between puritans and terrorists, are the two extremes, but both involve sacrifice, whereas purists use sacrifice as a form of conditioning, whereas terrorists use and involve the sacrifice of others. But both of these extremes, are reactions to a certain cause, perhaps extremists are driven there by a view that the average person of their belief is too feeble, but this is no expressive soul reaction, but perhaps a reaction of anger and shame forged into a sword of hate!

526

Conversations 1

Lover
For you see, as I see that things do not follow a logical order, especially in love. You do see, for we are all lovers by default. One must approach these matters, not through logic, but to understand through creative channels.

Philosopher
One wonders how you talk, as if you know too many things and your senses have become blunted. As if you hide from your mind what you soul senses to be a better path.

Lover
It is not a crime to deceive. For is not deception an instrument, which can be used for manipulation, but also for good.

Feminist
How you both think! You men....

527

Empathy is a material relationship, though the word derives from passion: as through empathy we seek our mirror rather than being an ear - the empathetic person is not the seeker of truth, but of the sameness of oneself in the world....Rejecting much in a derived conservative manner, a good ear hears all the spectrum of the other, but it is selfish to listen to only words that echoe one's mind.

528

What we deserve in life is not what we want, but neither is what we want in life our true steps in life: the course of life can feel like a snake with fangs.

529

Conversations 2

Lover

Relax; we do not think in order to gain confidence. We think in order to find out what we think about.

Philosopher

For it is possible to think, and to not know what one is thinking about.

Lover

It this not the way that the world spins, but not at a constant speed!

Philosopher

It is the way the ball bounces. One needs untruth as one needs truth. For what makes a person, is the ability to lose and find oneself, again and again. This is how the world really spins...can you not feel it’s motion underneath – are you drunk?

Lover

Though the conversation is not lacking....I am reminded about other things I must do.

Feminist

You are correct in what you say so earnestly. But we have said enough and the mind can only go so far at a time.

530

One should not try to read life too much, one’s eyes look here and there, better to just understand the path ahead of oneself. Life can feel like a scribble from one side of the page to the other side, for the paths of others flow through vice or virtue, whether they celebrate their glory, or suffer from their vices and difficulties, such is the drama of life....or the temperament of living; as one is the sun of all one’s relationships and not the orbit of others.

531

Our old emotions seem to lag like a fog, from birth to our last few years. Though they can feel very interactive each day, and constantly asking questions....this must be an illusion, for these old emotions stand as the freshness of life, when my new emotions seem so stale.

532

Decay in a soul.- When the search for truth becomes the search for oneself, outside of truth. Such escapism is a vain lightness, without weight in a world; to enter a cartoon world does one not become a cartoon or caricature of one’s personality. Even though the size of one’s sea does not change, it can be unnoticed when the depth of this sea turns shallow. All people will desire truth, but many do not notice that they are not finding truth, but a validation of themselves: outside of truth....So they notice the lines of their faces, and ask am I getting older, or am I more pretty or handsome: but not noticing a lack of pathos in one’s expressions, that spell one is becoming a cartoon, or experiencing a loss of self, rather than a loss of age?

533

The hidden elite in society.- Snobbery is the virtue of self-esteem with short-cuts: faith without belief. The sense of wanting to be superior to others is also connected to self-esteem, but self-esteem in it's best form is harmony with others.

534

Conservations 3

Philosopher

We all lose ourselves in time, it is about the nature of ourselves and also the nature of time....for time brings us here to have this conversation, and it will also separate us to our separate ways!

Philosopher touches his mouth (with the second finger of the hand), as if to hide an expression.

Though we talk, this is not the aim of life. It is time for me to go, as we are well enough today: I will go as I come.

Philosopher writes at home a letter....

Dear life,

My day began slowly, but night waited patiently. This lover lacks the patience of discipline, but hides more secrets than I wish to know. Darkness is creeping, though it is not dark yet. What a strange drama I live in, in a tired mind ideas bloom. A day is an ocean.

Yours faithfully,

The winds of time

The philosopher drifts into sleep like an echo searching, who am I? The dream of the philosopher:

Across what is,
And moving with this,
Slowly but surely....
Through the vision of new memories-
Pictures as silent as the night,
Under the shadow of the moon.
Sssh be quiet, my thoughts turn to ice.
The coldness wakes my hidden resources,
Light leads from this ice to the sky,
Bright and far, and becomes a bird,
Seeking a place to land,
With confusion its wings fall from the sky.
Like a comet he falls and awakes!

535

Poem of Down

A falling star, sleeping as the moon;
The Pathos of falling.
Moving things with steel will.
Time, ‘the shadow of your smile’?
Money drives education down.
For many down becomes the noun,
For the light makes the darkness.

536

It was the nature of evil that virtues were not needed and that brute force was enough, but now evil has evolved; it fights for virtues with brute force. Though the nature of good is that virtues were fought for in the defence of other virtues, this had evolved from the idea that goodness was virtue: in antiquity the hero was something that represented a separation from what was wrong with the world. It is for this reason that evil has evolved in a way to attack and destroy the nature of the hero which represented also the essence of the representation of founders of religions, but now one hears of counterfeit religions....if battles exist they must exist on certain grounds?

537

A novel philosophy.- The forces of good and evil act upon people – if goodness is a derivative of positivity, then evil is a derivative of negativity. People are not aware of being good or evil, as they both are derivatives: sincerity built over a false sense of goodness, and validated through a social life.

Though the derivative of good and evil in a person will eventually become emotive, though it is not passion (which is a budding cause) but this second derivative is the force that is transferred between people and this creates drama in life, this is why (being a second derivative) it teaches nothing about life but it produces novels and stories which serve to pass time.

538

Few people look at themselves face to face (in the mirror of perception) even the most vulgar of people; if observed from a certain angle, will reveal a majestic opinion of their statue. Such is the weight of self-opinionated perceptions, if they ever touch the ground it will be like a comet: one needs much truth to look at oneself.

539

Conservations 4

From the spirit world, a demon is driven, to meet these thoughts – it appears before the thinker.

Philosopher

Who are you? How suddenly you appear! I know you are here, though I see nobody else in the room.

Demon

Why do your eyes want to see me – is not sight an illusion.... I travel here in pleasure, for only more pleasure, the devil’s game, I am a demon from your spirit world. A world which exists in your world, as a person’s spirit exists within um their thoughts.

Philosopher

I do not know your game,
But listen to me,
And widen your ears.
Do I speak in poetry or prose –
How do you define me?
Has my character become confused?
For am I not Faust?

Demon

Speak in prose, and not in poems or riddles. I know you are not Faust, but you desire to shine like Zarathustra. Look in my eyes, though you do not see me, and tell me what you see: open your eyes from within.

Philosopher

Tell me who is greater, Faust or Zarathustra?

Demon

But they do not exist, how can one be....

Philosopher

That is why I am named as I am named. For who is fooling you, is not fiction....fiction. Do not the characters lie when they are given names? Cannot drama be created out of conceptual characters.

Demon

Which way does your wind blow, what path do your eyes seek. Do you attack me or Faust?

Philosopher

Can you not see as far as I can see?

Demon

My nature is evil, which makes me limited. I desire to know about goodness, for is there not pleasure in knowing the truth. Please continue as you do....

Philosopher

Are not the lies people put in drama confused riddles. Why cannot stories be stories? Why cannot reality express itself more through reality?

Demon

I do not understand you, but I doubt if any angel could. Listen to me, listen deep. What I say is beyond evil, this comes from the mouth of an inspired demon who seeks depth in reality. I was attracted to you through desire of pleasure....some sort of inspiration is altering me.

540

That social life.- As if acting is greater than being, people refuse to shift. One may prefer to persuade others that one is something who one is not, that one is a good soul - to control the perceptions of others one forges a perception of oneself, some people see this as a distant aim.... Thus there is the con man, deceiving a person of their money and the social parasite who deceives social need for personal need.

541

In essence, nobody knows why the heart hungers, what is a man or woman – nobody knows, what is one to do in the day – nobody really knows? Even passion is no answer, perhaps one is not a question? Perhaps the soul exists as the spider in the web, one knows it is there in the shed in the garden: it is a question of being, and not doing – if it is of doing, one moves back to why the heart hungers, or the nature of one’s desire to travel!

542

Conversations 5
Before the thinker the Demon was no more in a demonic sense, and was visible. The philosopher was anxious for answers, for meaning that would shelter him from the rain of reality.

Philosopher

Before me – demon, you have materialised before me.

Demon

Let visions come to me, halleluiah. This is no miracle but such can happen from expression born from skill, and innocent sincerity. Dear guru, I have been baptised by wisdom.

Philosopher

Though you stand well with gravity – people will come and reject your power of craft. But this is this world – I want to know of hell!

Demon

What are such words, how can they be said. For heaven is an illusion as hell. You see, for a demon reality is hell, and to an angel of light, is not their reality of Heavenly bliss. Thus my kind one, are not heaven and hell created from reality.

Philosopher

Are these words not from a transformed liar! What I feel that you are saying is that when one is unhappy, or low spirited you are in your hell. Also if you be passionate – you are happy in heaven.

Demon

Who else could inspire such ideas of glory, the ones that surround you!

Philosopher

One has to live in hell and heaven. For darkness is the heat of passion, and light is the wisdom of truth. What does lie in the essence between birth and death?

Demon

The answer is disappointment, for if there is an answer to the meaning of life, the answer would lead to another question: the riddle of the answer is the riddle of the question.

Philosopher

If there is no answer, how can I balance the scale of consciousness?

Demon

One can balance it with the idea of eternal recurrence. For the solution to the greatest problem is not the greatest answer, but the greatest idea. You are a cosmic dancer; we step in and out of reality. Is there joy in repetition!

Demon

If I am a hallucination than I am your fear of hell – your invention!

Philosopher

Where life ceases one must invent life!

543

Pathos of will to inspire to rise: people tend to encourage you to progress when they have reached a certain standard, but when you go near or beyond their limit, a poor sincerity emerges: one should desire others to excel themselves (whether it be above oneself or not) – but to will it is a passion of sincerity.

544

The wind vale.- If something has an ending one must set sail there irrespective of the winds blowing, also irrespective of where the winds comes from. For all have to follow the rules of life, though they may appear in a suit of authority, as authority wears high heels! If something does not have an ending, one must set sail to the winds, especially the inner winds and the winds of change....continue....though to decorate is not to continue.

545

The equation of love.- Constantly adjusting values, creating and destroying: each day offers such doors. On does not need a creative atmosphere for such evaluations, it is the will to will. Like a sculpture one becomes art, an expression of a living being. Though all is merely nature, and our inventions all come back to nature. Even our romantic love, is simply about how to make each others values add up, such is the equation of love, it is also the equation of nature.

546

One has to argue with the necessity of guidelines, the substance and angle of the soul – for passion is the only true guideline: that can lead the soul as a plane’s path is seen lighted in the air in the night. Though art, culture and law give guidelines though claimed and caged in citizenship, perhaps belonging to a nation, though not belonging to oneself, as an intruder one lives one’s life....and in the distant horizon, seeing a never land: the action of being in the nationality of the self: confusing the self between possibility and impossibility.

547

False humanism, a love for ideas about civilisation, and modern living, as with false romance, a love of ideas about femininity or masculinity.

548

Integrity deserves (and needs) a little luxury.- Everyday acts of evil use the nature of misunderstanding; it claims not to really mean whatever it actually means. The burden of passion is why most lose their way, but the path of justification is numerous, contrast this to the path of losing one’s way which is only one nameless path: it is something else to lose oneself on a path, rather than to lose oneself on no path, except the path of the will!

549

One thinks so much to stop thinking.- With passion we feel our lives, for we cannot see our lives, we simply see what we see. Like the blind, one has one’s hands stretched, and senses directions - for all eyes are blind to the nature and substance of their lives: to let go, as if life were a stream.

550

When the will is weak, one is not close to the will; it may suggest a perceptive weakness, or a desire for security, instead of a drive for it. When the will is weak, the fire is lost in us, lost in one’s created dimension....

551

Poem

Too far from the stars, and too close to the moon

To wish and dream,
As things are as they appear.

Of wealth of mind,
All complexities in focus.

The fog of necessity drifts closer,
In a way like motion.

Like freedom breaking chains,
Like a forbidden truth being found.

Oh, let it all drift away,
For the wind blows hard.

Things need little aid to crawl,
Scattered thoughts like broken glass.

Things collide, and motion moves,
But I follow words that do not drift?

Suffer, like a delayed judgement?
When words come slow.

552

Sometimes the sun glows philosophically for philosophy is also a method of expression – expression becomes reason....sink to equations, but equations are foundations in disguise. The young should be like questions, but they believe themselves to be answers - (but many drums are banging) early mistakes can be embarrassing, and creating is only a part of the cycle of construction, which is only part of the cycle of love, to believe in love is to believe in ‘reaping what one sows’.

553

Perhaps in spring or autumn I will be my sign post.- It is the driving force of want and need that makes us who we are; the vices are hidden in want and need, it is written even on the expressions of the young. Though youthful people who are new to life, see every cliché as a moment of truth, but the truth is that one will die as one has witnessed the death of others....life can be reduced to a blur.

554

A tree without leaves.- The temperature drops with a quickening of the heart, with courage and passion I sense that I desire a freedom from the values of culture. Leaves fall like forgetting character labels, as it is circumstances that bring people together. Answers may come with the fire of enlightenment, but question marks (?) symbolise the rain, for the symbol of the question mark, is a combination of an exclamation mark, and one bracket, which suggests a certain kind of search like the honest expression of a tree without leaves (? = ()+!)).

555

We are everything in the sense that we have enough of the known, and the unknown in us. The sense of life is to find sense in it, and our instincts come into it; enough to make our blood boil.

Looking at the colour white, such as a ceiling can resolve much – for it provides a blank sheet for one’s reflections concerning the mind. Whereas emotions desire connection, as if our bodies were a hard-wired device! Consequently, only objects sustain perfect relationships, like a chimney and fire place. To store more and sentimental longing will reach us less often as in a camel, which can carry the soul over the desert that the day can be: for cultural mistakes could exist?

556

Fire does burn, but it produces light.- It is only through the neutral understanding of good, and evil that one learns how to shine. For the nature of fire is of burning, as the senses are to the intellect, even the passion of the soul is a derivative of fire, a spiritual or humid lightness: the only true metaphor of fire.

557

Belief and personality.- We deceive ourselves into wanting the image which we sense or imaginatively convinces us our personality fits into: but what we put in our personality changes our personality, unless it is already there in a derivative or original form – of it....

558

Perception of subjective weakness.- The vanity of one’s life has to be admitted to an accuracy that extends from one’s normal accuracy to an unprecedented level. The path from emotional chaos to emotional order is the path of clarity....to link up the concrete experiences with what we know and feel....to be aware of one’s consciousness. Our subjective weakness is buried in feelings, but feelings are free from evaluations and meaning; they cannot be simply worked out, our feelings and fears follow convention rules of energy, and not an intellectual doctrine – drift on.

559

Your conditions of existence are your conditions of being.- Transitions are intermediate like crayons on paper, for they can be washed. Like we are, and want to be, like folded perception. So see the fraction like the wave of what is, like thoughtful thought like time used to be. Though the freshness dies, so let it disappear into nothingness.... our shadow awakes, and perhaps one may not feel like a shadow: but if one feels like a shadow one will not know it.

560

poem

The old can have fresh expressions,
As youth can have old expressions.
Watch the embrace of old shadows-
Does isolation creep one into submission,
Like a fear of averageness, and rejection.
A strategy of expansion, to sense life.

561

If there is no absolute truth, and we are made in the image of God, what do these two things tell you when combined together? First if morality is subjective to God, then it is subjective to us, because we are all in a play where one is held responsible to weigh truth and morality according to one’s varying situations within the play.

562

Forgetting and remembering may be the dance of the consciousness, but what really makes us forget, in this world of such friction - it is difficult!

563

To move on in something one has to get closer to the unity of that thing.

564

One cannot forget the present.- Past, present and future are interweaved as the colours of the rainbow, but we all are of the past, for the present only follows the past! But how close to the past is the present? Philosophy needs to distill the past, whereas psychology spreads it out like a deck of cards - sin forgets the past altogether.

565

Every unlike perspective in life is a choice and a different freedom; as freedom is about possibility, and not impossibility. Though the nature of freedom is always relative, so an absolute concept of heaven cannot be defined from freedom – does one need freedom from God, as freedom is a contra expression: one needs only freedom when one is repressed by vices or sin; but this is relative to a person's perspective of the nature of their morality.

566

Many people fail as they preach depth can be bought with a ticket, and a vague sense of spiritual need.- To want more, that is what we all seek, of the material and the non-material in one desire or the other; it is greed to want more when one is hungry: to want more when one is not hungry is a sincere want. Allow me to add (what occupies most people in the civilised world) that the riddle of weight loss is also the riddle of living in a castle or tent: sometimes one does not feel hungry when one is hungry, how many full bellies feel hungry? To want a castle while seeing one’s misery is to want misery; for in one’s court of consciousness the context of ‘want’ is acknowledged. In the court of one’s consciousness, if a ‘want’ is empty it is anti-money, or anti-desire, though how can lust be desire if it consumes desire, and leads one to wanting desire more than feeling desire!

567

Passion is individual to being human (but more than our uniqueness), perhaps such uniqueness is divided in other species of this world – many would argue that animals are soulful, perhaps they have a different nature of soul: but belief is belief, to talk about belief is to preach; it is the feeling of ourselves that comes from unknown depths within us, like a drop of lava from the centre of the world.

568

The quest for passion is the need and the feeling of home in life, and of life in the home: which is not resonance in life meaning simply how one sits on life, instead of how one walks on life. It is the nature of being to walk (to think with passion) in life, the quest of passion is to see what cannot be seen – not that it is hidden, but life is like a blossom, it’s depths may be hidden in the form of a bud.

569

The angles of advantages and spades of disadvantages of being a loser.- As winning in life can be many things, just like losing – some less impressive, and losing can be less pathetic. The forces of life can bark one into a dark alley way; one shivers, for the darkness stills oneself – one realises the flame of passion, that inner flame has been extinguished. Without passion there can be no story true to one’s life, for the winner must be the loser: one must lower oneself to see what there is between oneself and the horizon.

Betrayal may also be the prerequisite of being a loser; perhaps this prompted Buddha to leave his palace, but he did not pretend to be a loser for he left luxury too which may have defined him as a winner in the eyes of many. Christ was also betrayed, and there was also a necessity for Christ to lose, denied even by Peter, the loss is seen by many as an ultimate sacrifice of a martyr. Though many take this is literally, but Jesus walking into the desert and meeting Satan may be a metaphor of walking into one’s spirit, or walking into the mist. Maya attacks people more when they make such steps, and even in the Gita in Eastern Philosophy the story starts by the hero being a loser. Yesterday I was asked, ‘How was I doing?’ – I sensed betrayal, but I said I was rolling.

And something on present political design; pretending to be losers on the left and winners on the right in the idealistic living sense: though such righteous see no natural horizon, and the left cannot see beyond its own face of reality! Better to seek one’s own feeling than to seek the feeling of other views, but two points now, firstly the feeling of oneself changes as one changes, it is the feeling’s journey on the path between the winner and loser, or the advantages and disadvantages of being a loser.

Commentary On Aphorism: The angles (advantages) and spades (disadvantages) of being a loser

The winner sees the horizon, the meaning of this, is the racer aiming for the finishing line: the metaphor here is used here comparing the horizon to the finishing line, this is my invention! Also the first time that the aphorism has political over tones in this chapter (passion of being), pretending to be losers means not really being losers as not being allowed to compete with big stakes in life, and vice versa for winners as pretending to be winners, as not playing fairly and deciding who wins by their skin colour, culture or religion, not in the normal sense are winners acknowledged by ability, merit and passion. Also I have used the term winner, not in the sense of heroes; but a winner can be a hero, or a hero can also be a winner in life. I am biased as I am against present political design i.e. left and right policies...I am concerned with the next political design on account of the dreariness of obviousness that the right, left conflict creates as a necessary conflict for an establishment of so called world order, camouflaged melancholy which drugs the world to insanity.

The proverb version of this aphorism for the real loser, not the pretend loser is:

Quick questions, but distant answers.

The maxim version of this aphorism is:

The winner drops the mantle, and voluntarily becomes a loser of sophisticated boredom.

570

Passion has to be self-defining and self-meaning, though not life affirming, it is the gentle friend that encourages and pushes oneself forward. Through enthusiasm and confidence life is affirmed but one may only see the goals in one’s personal life, but there is space between the bridge and river, where one’s spirit lives. Many things lie between the whisper and the spoken word, but hate is clever and deception is the concept of life; there has to be another way....there is too much shame in living, life feels unnatural!

One cannot compromise one’s spirit, but it’s the ego that begs this and for this reason it is considered a vice: is it not why passion is forgotten, nor are people drawn to it. The health of the body is one thing, but the health of the soul many also evade, but it may also be the ego that preaches!

571

Sometimes (the audience has to become invisible) words are not enough, but the path between words and feelings can escape. But passion is stronger for it needs no ear which words do; meaning expression expressed in words. But passion is the flight of spirit, but needs no ears for it needs not the justification of acclaim but establishes itself into a system of life which only needs the justification of itself; it is the life of vanity that one should worry about and not the pressures of life, for a cycle with flat wheels belongs to the back garden (of life).

572

Passion is what nobody wants, but everybody wants as it is the feeling without feeling: for it digs in the abstract nature of living.

573

The essence of the question, what if I am a question? So is the world an answer, no it contains the question!

574

A sigh to vanity, my soul - the depth of winning is losing.

575

Reflections outside a children's playground.- The inner-conflict is about the conflict of emotion and reason which represents the perimeter of the playground. The pivot of this see-saw may be our direction in the cycle of our motion in life, the slide our judgment, and the stars are our souls; as we swing high our eyes reach for the horizon. The roundabout of love speaks of cycles of winner to loser (where losing is an extension of winning, though not so in many cultural definitions). The faster the roundabout swings, the blur of life reminds us that life is about change: meaning ourselves - the control of others is an illusion!

Commentary on the thinking playground

The non-culturality of the nature of truth of the aphorism is mentioned as a definition of a loser. Whereas cultural truths are static, this is a gliding dynamic truth on the importance of play in life, it is adults that teach children how to play, perhaps this is why children do not know how to play, but a pretending of play. People bark more than dogs, and we wag our tails more as living has lost its edge: for living is representing life, and not being life, play is representing play but not being pain. We blame wars for our problems, and people of power, but our problems are ourselves; for the elementary ingredients are not there, like passion, love, compassion, play and truth: being distant truths from another star.

576

Stretching life.- Some days, everything seems to be on one's side, and on others everything is against oneself - it is the Individual that does not waver in this. This strong sense of self with no feeling of regret but passion: may it not be a forbidden truth! May the holy spirit rise like a technological breakthrough.

577

The book of life.- Life needs a purpose, a will, this means lives must have an inner cunning. Every person must have a talent, whether a sleeping talent or a conscious one - this is not evolution but the nature of existence or life: no person's life is a blank page. For life's best deeds - are they worthy of the book of life, and other people are the punctuation of the day.

578

To be or not to be a person of cause.- It is not so easy to connect with life from the inside; how many dull outdoor people does....But being outside to connect with life may not necessarily connect oneself to life from the inside, the most out-door people do become outside people like beggars, who are refused the everyday concept of home. Some people travel all their lives, but to travel with integrity one must not desire to connect, but travel with purpose: one has to first connect with life from the outside, before one can connect to life from the inside! One has to be a person of effect first, and this is the light before one becomes a person of cause: a person of passion of being.

579

To try too hard to be in a place is a lack of harmony even in ambition, better to be in a decline that belongs to oneself.

580

Middle Of Nowhere.- Everything must return somewhere if it is from somewhere, depth in philosophy is a pre-requisite for being somewhere - though if one has no orbit then there is nothing to return to. Being in an orbit in life does enhance mood especially when one recognizes points in the orbit where one has been before; creating a comfort zone. This is why seeing the planet from a satellite is such a mood enhancer in a simple context.

Where can one go if one is nowhere? Even if an obscure place is a thing in itself, then it is somewhere, but being nowhere is a full desire of being somewhere: in such a state one is more likely to point one's finger.

581

The movement of love has to extend beyond prejudice, if it stops before prejudice, then love dissolves into prejudice. If love becomes absorbed by prejudice, culturally social empathy becomes love. Culturally love becomes a lie, but this lie is necessary for culture, for people have to believe they are capable of love....it is the purpose of culture to use social empathy! One has to ask oneself who one thinks has more love, and why is this so, and who appears to have more love: perhaps the one that gives more out of social empathy.

Commentary

Culture is not a complex lie structure, perhaps it is but it's purpose is not to serve truth but to serve the country of that culture. This is a work that stands outside the comfort zone of thinking, many do try to think outside the box but fail as the box is within another box....

Questions related to this aphorism

Why is love very vague, and hate so, well precise in culture?

How is language connected to culture?

Who or what does language serve?

Is happiness a lie also created by culture?

What forces drive culture?

If culture was visible, would it work?

What is the relationship between the culture and vice of people?

582

Being with others.- Empathy is over estimated because we are all of the same race, but beacuse we are of the same race passion is under estimated because we believe in a virtual safety net.

583

The moon of fulfillment, the enchantment of excitement and the destiny and effect of desire and purpose.- On cannot give anything to another, for people seem to be self-defined in terms of their wealth; when some things are added other things are taken: when a good idea is found another idea loses it's potency of effect. The act of giving in essence is giving to oneself with no terms - the expansion of oneself can occur by giving outwardly against the gravity of life. Possibly this is a new spiritual idea, one may argue that one is helping another, but what is the desire to help another - it is one's desire, which will share the same aim with the person being helped, but it is still one's desire.

So somebody asked me yesterday, how do you make a million, well - you have to think about it. He showed me his thinking; but he seemed pretending to think about this but was willing to dwell about the triviality of his boredom in a real sense. It seemed the prospect of thinking about the million casted a shadow on things he valued, the only expansion that occurred was the giving to myself.

The idea of giving to oneself through the pretension of giving to others, is based on the fact that only oneself is real to oneself. Even humanists can only be pretentious that others can exist as real as they do to themselves; one can only exist for oneself in a spiritual sense - one cannot truly connect to another's feelings without disconnecting to one's own feelings. The enchantment of excitement is true to one's desires: one cannot have pathos to other people's desires or sense of purpose and will.

584

A hacking-up senseless driven life.- Life must be endured, with or without ill meaning or spirit - we are not just delivered from the pain of the womb. Being as cold as winter can be as softening as Prozac - life has little merit in an igloo, LET THE INNER SUN SHINE. Life commits us to endure different levels of (cycles of) pains - not all pain is a moral or ethical tease it can also be a test of endurance. For what is the meaning of health - the medicine cycle rolls on and on....

Such is the nature of this world, if a golden age of heaven existed it will not be pain free, but free off the vices that cannot accept pain, but life is not pain (even the social life is a long shopping list). To hack life into a pleasure cruise to escape the medicine wheel is to compromise one's inner sensibility; to ignore the realm of passion.

Some that try to creep on the borders of pain...some do not desire answers; a pain to others more or less. But the argument is a plain one as nature knows; the flower knows it must bear winter: so must our moods bear fears and tides of ill pressure or health.

585

Passion rests in humility at the tip of the inner flame of the soul. It is our inner positioning of identity of pose, whereas the outer identity (how we bow to the world) is carved in its image.

Deeper still, in a second paragraph! In our nature lies a cave where we make no shadows where lightness is being and all things collide and do not collide. Here lies where I am defined: the naked self, it is always awake, free from the senses and the body. In its purest form it desires nothing, but to watch the seering ripples of living. It is ambition in its highest and lowest state.

586

Natural confidence is more real but less potent than willed without honesty type fireworks confidence.- People talk about false beliefs in the religious sense, but what is a daydream turns into a nightmare – when one realizes that false beliefs rest deep in people, hidden with ego and disguised with confidence: wrong beliefs believed with certainty, minds twisted like snakes and honest expression hijacked: honest expression is control – not a maxim of my invention….

Commentary

Are not some people too confident? Paralyzing the will for self-control; living in a world of mirrors, confused with reflection (numerous reflections possibly) and reality. Though the intention of the aphorism is very sharp, the style is very blunt. I have always wondered where people’s confidence comes from, it appears unnatural. I mean what a person does, but act through confidence; and if the confidence comes from the wrong place: actions will hint it out! My small break from writing was to invite truth, but not truth in the context of writing, but in the context of life: to rise to a new landscape.

587


Conversational Aphorism with a Shadow That Moves


I
I am watching change in glory, and temperatures in reflex and motion from speeds….but I desire an island for my life.


The shadow that moves
It is suicide to desire this Robinson Crusoe. Things would lag – your emotions will become elderly, and lose all sense of will.


I
It is all perception, you can never be real. People even call the shadows light!


The shadow that moves – confused
Your deception is not made of chains, but a will refined.


I
What is deception….one must first find a love of the city. Perhaps then my emotions will find youth, for contact with others is like hungry waves hitting the rocks of a cliff. Many islands of soul have cliffs which circle them?


The shadow that moves
I am a victim of culture, but it is the swansong of the losers club
What is a loser and failure?


I
The Loser does not vibrate with life, they are not one life – naturalness does not grow in their garden; neither aesthetics. The failure may know naturalness, but they do not feel their souls, they cannot connect with their essence. They believe passion to be deception – their view is not above and below dreams.


The shadow that moves
I dance well, but better to dance with life.


I
Being impressive is simply shining, but being is to be the day.


The shadow that moves
I will deceive people about you, for I am the mist.


I
You become mist, you disappear – impressive! Too much deception and you lose self-control; you will then want to control others!


The shadow that moves
My heart is jealous, you even control this – all shadows are drawn to souls that emulate the light.


I
All suns will play with shadows, but deception ages fast.


The shadow that moves
My effect is real, but only on the outside – nobody is allowed any further.


I
It is moving?


The shadow that moves
In days of old: shadows told time – shadows moved in sundials, I whisper in the night, I hold my breathe, and use copy and paste passion!


I
I never trusted such clocks – time is a puzzle – to tell the time is not to solve the puzzle: all you shadows become one shadow of social deception.


The shadow that moves
I need more sweets – it is my job to deceive my soul into being content.

588


Conversational Aphorism with a Silent Shadow


Silent Shadow
Are we all doomed in self-deceit, living blind folded? But you are no light of hope-I simply see words!


I
You said it. The light in oneself sees the light in others, but the darkness in oneself can only guess at it.


Silent Shadow
Warmth is what we desire, NOT the light.


I
You’re telling me, but the light has no warmth. For the sun and moon are shy too, like how a good day starts – not with thunder. The sun wears a veil, its modesty hides its warmth.


Silent Shadow
Warmth comes from the night.


I
You seek control of others, but lack self control. So you try to control with fists like instruments. If you lack control in identity you seek control of the identity of others, if you lack control in your creativity, you control (put to sleep) where you smell the creative drive in others.


Silent Shadow
I fear a lack of control, perhaps I believe I GAIN control from others? But is philosophy a heavy influence of control? Your aphorisms are like rain: bad weather!


I
It may not be as eye popping as a political budget, or having a new president with a statuesque profile. But culture is a lot of small things, drowning in everyday life can be a lot of small things, polite suicide is a lot of small things….quicksand: is a lot of small things.


Silent shadow
Passion is such an easy draw – who can find fault with something like that! Some say God is dead, and others God is alive – it is simply a different style of writing. Life does not whisper secrets to everybody.


I
It is more than style; culture is of many small things, made up of so many small things. No big thinking has changed culture, though culture changes direction, it even changes form, culture changes from inside.


….QUICKSAND is also a lot of small things.

Commentary on 588 – 3 parts

1

It is easy for people to deceive themselves. Deception occurs within a rosy inner mirror. But deception to oneself causes a fracture in the perception causing one to lose one's sense of self. The shadow is a character from the unconscious which was inspired from Jung, but nothing more than this. Originality is still the hallmark of this book.

2

The previous conversation with the shadow defined the winner, and loser, the numbers of such people may not be increasing, but their percentage is. Here drowns the deception of the world, failing any ontological being that reins the sphere of winning. Many too are motivated up the ladder of ambition, with financial awards to aid the deception, or if the deception to oneself is overwhelming, the desire to control can force one to a greater role of authority.

The vibration with life, the vanity of the loser, has been matched by the strumming of Mississippi John Hurt, here in the Blues lies the true vibration with life intoxicated with the passion of life. Blue also being the colour of morning, so Red is the colour of the evening. The vibration of the inner being, of less energy as red is to blue, I would liken to the piano play of Shubert.

3

Against the Darwin idea of evolution, survival of the fittest.- Loser has loser friends, loser marries loser, failure seeks failure: winners desire winners. Evolution can not work because we deceive ourselves, survival of the fittest means one partner has to accept being on a lower plane, evolution means needing a certain amount of honesty: though a certain change can occur to a species but it may not be evolution! Perhaps in the animal kingdom, if the female believes in aggression – it will impress on such qualities….but physical change not based on assertive choice, but aggressive choice still not evolution – for is the fittest the most aggressive?

589


Proof of passion, can it be a virtue in a court of law! It is the senses that lead one to proof - proof should be written with less blunt pencils including judgment – something could be dismissed if it is above one’s head: but later in years to come one may be…. in a higher landscape in one’s life – God forbid! Proof of passion is that one can sense a certain stare, hear another’s doubt, listen to another’s sense of life - such things are too small for a court room date….such inner turnings of swirl in a lake of dreams. A slight gesture, or quiet expression in the ears of another, what domino strumming would it make, such are the chains of cause and effect, a game no doubt for children? The truth is that passion is the movement of the spirit in the body – it is beyond the five senses between doubt and fear: close to the sea bed with the lost fish: to discover a pose – NOT PRETENTIOUS, NOT CLASSICAL….individual; designer label – Passion Limited.

Commentary

During the time of this writing, the family dog had been knocked over though he had quickly recovered from a broken leg. This made me remember a friend who had been knocked under a bus while riding on a bike after working all night in the morning. I also felt drawn to this quote from a Jewish book:

"And darkness was upon the face of the deep"
R. Jehudah

This aphorism is about small things, and how little they mean in a court of verdict – no matter how small the court, may be. How easily passion is lost, or burnt off in argumentation.

590

Non evasive answers and inner motivation.- Everything must …. I guess have some kind of answer which stops questions: the answers that express dances of the soul – only in the fire of passion such answers are found; as there are too many answers that still the mind to a dull trance. One is asking the right questions, because the questions are in us, we are the questions, our days: our lives: our unconscious!

Lightening came from a grayish dull sky as if it was spitted out from heaven, I fell instantly; in a dream in a saintly zone that words should not be able to describe I the soul was caressed, to awaken the passion.

Commentary

I my eyes art in its real sense should not feel like art, as Van Goth was; but art ages well. It seems to be content in the, limits of the moment that cage it: like humidity flirting with cheapness. Art fails if it is done through self importance, the artist struggles between the essence and the void. Thus I was inspired to do a second paragraph, a tangent to the unconsciousness.

Why do I do this! Sometimes it is so difficult to ignore the obvious, things happen, the world spins out of control. I can be carried a way with the hypocrisy of politicians after a hard days work at night – I might, or a man with a gun on a killing spree: but to state the obvious the city is a big place and we are not made of nuts and bolts. It is just an escuse to write in the name of cat sentimentality, or dog willingness. I write because that is what I am.

591

Being alive, but in what sense of being alive?-The desire to control is a hunger for passion – like an arm reaching from the dimness of a faint soul. Such a soul’s light can barely be felt which is cradled by a pat on the back by one’s kind: you have honour, we respect you….. They utter bowing. I have to admit my passion is not seen by most, but was noticeable by very faint souls.


Father lies to son, mother lies to daughter. The soul cries, I want life get me out of here, push me out. But out of where because where you are is who you are - know thyself; you are not being deceived but have become deception. One can reach to passion too late, but in such a state one knows I know something about something, but then it is too late. You may ignore passion, and yes there is personality in you – maybe…. Personality is the aesthetic of the soul. But better to have more, than less….though having more is always about having less: though not in the cultural sense but in the aesthetic sense.


Commentary


The faint souls have their chant; the individual has to tackle the ball past their cultural sameness. They see no passion in the collective ring, but there is nothing wrong with sameness, it lies in a feeling to belong, the old feeling of home. But does not the individual come from that same place? One finds sameness before one finds individuality, maybe like a bird flying home in the winter, the individual also flies to the sameness, but its pathos has changed!


There has been much change in my life, I cannot even recognize myself. This aphorism is psychological for it is about the sameness in a group, the pathos of the sameness, and the freedom in the group....

592

Forgetful we are, and how much we want to be, but the unconsciousness never forgets, every moment is carved in the path we walk, spirals of hypocrisy, or spirals of truth. Every breath rises to the heavens, and every sigh negates our desires.

Passion de-humidifiers the world and cools our inner air; frees us away from the cage of empathy, and one’s indifference to it. We watch our feelings like silent ghosts, we truly ignore our feelings. Through passion we tune to the frequency of ourselves: one should feel like oneself, and not as one once felt; one should feel as one is.

Commentary

The cage of empathy is basically a group of people that allow no diversity. A group based on sameness, empathy is so extreme it becomes a cage, and few other emotions are permissible. It is an example of how the ego betrays the soul – am I swimming into spiritual waters here in a work of philosophy? One last word is that multi-culture is in its lower level an expression of sameness, but Individualism simply dissects the sameness: it plays with it, but does not bow to it. For sameness does not need to be expressed, but rearranged: only differences are expressed.

593

Being alone and the nature of complexity.- The desire of being in essence is living life by connection – observing the natural connections day by day; the sense of where one is in life….

Thinking without desire, without thought; yet a sponge to passion uniting one’s horizon with the horizon of oneself looking into the distant future in mystic light: yet humble to one’s shadow and to God’s complex reflections in the conscious watery tranquilities of dimensions. Ah, never complain about the complexity of God, but be contently annoyed at the complexity of life; nod to the world as if the sun rises and falls in some obscure way or connection. The complexity of unknown feeling, of unknown things is the very nature of complex, but complexity is not detail, nor depth; but paths not created.

Being alone one connects to the surface of oneself, being with others one connects to the surface of others. When circumstances and situations change one connects in different ways. But being more complex is seeing one’s passion, when eyes become mirrors to one: when the will is introverted.

Commentary

This aphorism is about allowing life to become more complex, and to create paths where no paths exist.

Two points, firstly to think with passion is to think so inertly that the brain is not used (one does not think in a normal sense), to think inside the body and not to think by the body. What is being in a state of complexity but multi-tasking, not multi-doing, allowing the will to be wild. As being of a will, is being in focus which is simply about concentration, the will must become more faceted for individual pathos to be made.

594

Atmosphere pretends to be a mist.- In the mist of our day to day business, we drive through on the seat of habit, a drug of the conscious. The most common habit is walking as we are either moving towards or away from something. Passion is the internal walking, the walking that sees no path; in essence it is pure freedom.

Your actions and voice are consequences of your soul, which determine how people handle atmosphere, and awareness comes from irritability induced by the mist. There is a hidden clock within us, a hidden clock in our unconscious; it lies in the cloudy mists of our presence.

Commentary

I did a collection of notes called Freedom from the Rules of Life in my early twenties, though not worthy to be published. Nevertheless they are worth integrating into this chapter. So from aphorism 594 it will be a walking stick…. Money wise, I am taking a gamble – one needs practicality with work in life.

There is so much between the mind and heart that the world has not seen. Don’t people think that something is missing – a natural union between passion and ourselves. How many people feel that they will fall apart in the middle of the day? This aphorism addresses the spirit.

595

Behind the chaos of life; beyond the whispering echo of society. - What if we could lift up the curtain of life – to see life stripped of all present (confusion of ….) illusion to reveal the actual intents of life. Behind what we see are the reasons of our living, seeing and breathing. Nothing to do with Freudian unconsciousness, but some other science, what about the unconsciousness of life. What if we could see the unconsciousness of life as characters in a play? Not for realizations, but some other approach? If only we could see the external hands that come towards us if we are pieces in some other dimension as a game. It is something for later….

For life imposes on us, in the same way that our dreams, desires and wants impose on others. We need to compose ourselves, so our imperfections are perceived with perfect perception. Never to fall short: one must give with heart, it is no fault to give more than one can receive – it is not the fault of giving but the fault of taking.

Commentary

One and a half weeks have past just playing with an apad, the Google version of the ipad. I will be on my first true holiday in the sense of leisure for many years on the 4th of October 2010, so no more posts till the next month.

The sexist word manager is actually bad English as it means to manage people not work. But his is what happens, people are managed, and not work, people are managed in the name of work, not work is managed in the name of workers. So the word needs work and should be altered to workager, and worker would become iworker (joke).

It is interesting that managers do not manage their lives, perhaps managing anything else is too close to work, and they would want to be more informal outside of work. They do manage their feelings oddly, but managing fears, is not facing fears - just clever thinking, which is as common as mud.

Getting back to 595, or close to it consider that we have virtual space on the net, and we have our physical spaces i.e. work and home, but there are other spaces such as our privacy where people can be guests or restricted. Perhaps we have virtual spaces spiritually? Though the idea of heaven is a spiritual space we are not connected to it personally in a spiritual way, but perhaps in an abstract way - there are other spaces, but not in the Kantian sense. For space is connected to the physical sense, as what is around of it, or enclosed by it. This definition fails to explain our most valuable type of space, privacy; such spaces exist in another dimension of reality.

596

The GPS of the soul – the inner pathos of direction.- Inspiration is about being pushed by a force of influence in the style of control that stimulates the will, but what is the meaning of the above – where is this above, or higher ground in the psyche of living (for are there co-ordinates in the psyche of North and South) and how does it transcend? How can we make distant aims in life? Who can make such steady aim – it is why many fail…. Or should I hoard ideas in the name of cowardice, never to write again!

Commentary

Three maxims from my early twenties in reference to GPS location in life:

One.-The aesthetic formula is the metaphor; perhaps nature has its own metaphors.

How many metaphors are motivated by the swing of nature - the metaphor is a way of mapping our situation.

Two.-Lies mature faster than wine, consider the weeds of nature. Consider how some people seem to mature? Youth sees such things!

This is making a point, it is easy to get lost, and when one is lost there is no map!

Three.-By artificially trying to create a path, one achieves a freedom of spirit without the ego and the unconscious realizes “Wild Is Thy Wind!”

If one is so lost in life, and directions spin like a weather vane in a storm one must create a path, which has never been walked upon. But one has to first have a realization that one is lost, an awakening.


597

Under Water Reflection

PRELUDE

One swims into the consciousness – drifts with life! Yet one feels one is in a valley....

The bed of ancient ruins – with a black sky.

Aphorism

One must acquire internal summary of relection, but not just from looking over one’s reflection on the surface of the river of life experiences but from the sense of looking from under water to the light muddled by ripples. Memories provide windows into experiences related to the soul.

We look at memories from life looking inward, we reflect on the path of life triggered by a newness drifting into a vinyl scratched memory, we should also reflect on memories by reflection looking from the soul to the memories of our life, and not just the senses looking at a memory in a sentimental moment; reflecting from under water is not aesthetic it is an abstraction of thought.

Commentary

Love will still sweat, even without negativity and the harshness within beauty (for nothing is ugly). One must explore things from different angles. How many become so obvious, with cups full to the brim, yet there is still hope. Is reality so harsh, or do we need empty cups, for there must be room for internal reflection of the order of spiritual philosophy.

There is so much advice, but is it adventurous buying i.e. adventurous taking: smile! Laugh! Talk more! Live more!